GT Winner

Keep checking boys!

2009-11-25T12:58:00.000-08:00

A bit off topic as far as the whole Movember thing is concerned but really worthwhile mentioning all the same. Back to the original blog subject. Way back at the start of the year I mentioned that my primary reason for starting the blog was to talk about my experience of testicular cancer. One of the things I talked about was the importance of self-examination.

Interesting then to hear today John Hartson (former Arsenal, Celtic and Wales footballer) talk of his experiences. In particular how he thought that he coud have avoided chemotherapy, surgery and a life threatening illness if only he had paid more attention. In his case it wasn't a lack of self examination, more it was a failure to act once he found something. I am sure this is something that a lot of guys are afraid of, particularly with our macho images but it is a necessary evil. So the message is two-fold here. Get examining and don't stick your head in the sand!

All the best boys and see the whole interview here.

Cheers,

Col.

Mo Progress - Week 4

2009-11-25T12:50:00.000-08:00

Seem to have missed a week somewhere? Maybe my whiskers just take it easy every third week? Who knows but here we are in week 4. Nearing the end of my month of celebacy for Movember (yep, it would appear that her indoors is not a fan of the old facial fluff).

The top lip growth is pretty thick by now. I am also growing strangely used to it..? although I have developed an awful habit though of licking my top lip (or should that be caressing?) with my tongue. Very unsightly I am sure. In homage to the great rugby victory of last weekend (and in particular the mighty Beattie) I have extended downwards a little these last few days. I think it adds a certain je ne sais quoi?? Non??

Some good donations from work today. Thanks guys to anyone who has taken the time to do the 'Movember Quiz' and donate. For anyone who has not donated yet....this might be your last chance. Please take a minute and put a couple of quid in the pot!

https://www.movember.com/uk/donate/your-details/member_id/227365/

All the best,

Col.

New 'tache hero

2009-11-22T14:25:00.000-08:00

I am just fresh from watching the highlights of the Scotland v Australia rugby international from yesterday (work unfortunately getting in the way of proper Saturday fare for the millionth time! oh to be a dentist...) All I can say is...what a brilliant performance! So great to see a Scottish team so full of energy for the fight and such raw commitment from the boys. Awesome. Truly awesome. Hopefully this will kick start Andy Robinson's reign as coach and prove to be the first of many great victories.

Plus. A bonus. The game has triggered a new 'tache hero. Step forward the mighty Johnny Beattie. Great performance and a 'tache to match.

There were quite a few mo's on the field, on both sides. The Aussies have been ardent supporters of the Prostate Cancer cause. Good on 'em but looks like our boys were beating them at their own game in more ways than one...

Now to just grow some downward extenstions over the next week...

Cheers,

Col.

Moustache Wax

2009-11-13T04:04:00.000-08:00

Since the beginning of Movember and all this chat of moustaches, I haven't been able to get the term 'Moustache Wax' out of my head. I have no idea what the aforementioned product does (I presume it is a styling product?), or who would be likely to use it (I have had no cause to resort to it as yet).

The reason the term is kicking about in my head is that it is mentioned in one of my all time favourite films - Point Break. Picture the scene, ageing cop Angelo Pappas is explaining to new kid on the block Johnny Utah (Keanu Reaves) his theory on the bank robbers - the Ex Presidents. He mentions moustache (or mustache) wax. Unfortunately, couldn't find the clip but here is the script:

GRAINY BLACK & WHITE VIDEO WITH TIME CODE

Ex-Presidents charge into bank, raise shotguns.

Image STOPS, then FAST-FORWARDS to the end.

WE ARE IN--

INT. FEDERAL BUILDING - BULLPEN - NIGHT

Dark, lit by the TV at the far end of the bullpen. PAPPAS and UTAH sit in front of the flickering Sony in the big empty room. Angelo punches a button on the VCR.

ON THE SCREEN--
LBJ turns his back to the fish-eye lens, drops trousers and moons the camera. Thank you.
Angelo FREEZES on LBJ'S butt.

PAPPAS
I'm tellin' ya, kid, it's in our face. Lookit the tan on this guy.
The young agent looks forward.
Stares at the white inscribed butt bracketed by deep bronze tan lines.

UTAH
Oh well he must be a surfer.

PAPPAS
Shutup, you might learn somethin' you're not careful... So last year Nixon scuffs a counter going over.
There was a soil sample. Non-specific mud traces of asphalt,oils, blah, blah... sand and...carnuba wax. So I became a wax expert. There's 80 some uses for this stuff, something like five hundred products.

He tosses Utah a ream of computer printout. Utah scans lists of brand names.

UTAH
Candle wax. Car wax. Mustache wax?
Could be anything. Guy's waxing his mustache at the beach. Gets sand in it. Wipes it off with a shoe. Shoe scuffs the counter.

PAPPAS
The lab made three possible matches, this was one of 'em.
Pappas opens his desk drawer, takes something out and throws it to Johnny. A pastel blue hockey puck wrapped in cellophane. A block of "Mr. Zog's Sex Wax".

UTAH
(reading)
Sex wax? You're not into kinky shit, are you Angelo?

PAPPAS
Surfers use it on their boards. They rub sand into it for traction.

UTAH
Thanks for the tip. I needed this knowledge.

Pappas shoves a thick file folder toward Utah.

PAPPAS

Now lookit the dates on the robberies. This is strictly a summer job for these guys.

Johnny leafs through it.

UTAH
... Four months. June to October. Mmmm...same the year before.

PAPPAS
Another month and we don't see 'em again 'til next summer.

Utah stares at Angelo as it dawns. Grins suddenly.

UTAH
They're traveling the rest of the year on the money, going where the waves are...

Pappas starts to smile. Suddenly, he jumps up onto his desk, gets down in a speed-crouch, arms extended.

PAPPAS
(to one and all)
The Ex-Presidents rip off banks to finance their endless summer!

I love that move. Like I said, don't have the exact clip but here are a couple of others, just for fun.

Cheers,

Col.

Famous Mo's of our time - Part 5

2009-11-13T02:27:00.000-08:00

I have been thinking of a 'tache hero to adopt. Much as I wish it had, my growth has not turned me into Magnum, or even Burt Reynolds for that matter. I figured I need to downsize my expectations. Thankfully 'team boy' Si-man-Chu has come up with the goods...

I am now going for the full on...Garthe Knight! Evil twin brother of the one and only Knight Rider, Michael Knight (played so famously by 'the Hoff'). Awesome!

If (very likely) I can't pull that off, I am going for this as the fall back...

...Kevin Kline in 'A Fish Called Wanda'! Who can forget the goldfish eating incident???

Cheers,

Col.

Mo' Progress - Week 2

2009-11-12T14:33:00.000-08:00

In some ways, it has been a slow week. On the plus side, some sponsorship, which is great, less itching, which is really great. On the down side, getting a bit prickly now and (being a sensitive soul) I am also getting dry lips, which is not ideal. My kids are starting to look at me a bit funny (even more so than normal) and I can tell my daughter is on the verge of refusing to give me a kiss. I fancy my wife may soon join her in this too! (I guess less action is inevitable considering the state of the Movember mans my top lip?) Still all in the name of a good cause...

I have gone for some triangulation of the tickler. Thought it might be a bit more...'sexy'? However, I fear it is just lending a little more 'Kevin Kleine in a Fish Called Wanda' to it all...?

Hey, ho keep smiling. Judgement day is the 15th and nearly half way through now!

Cheers,

Col.

PS turning the flash off does make the growth look more impressive!

Famous Mo's of our time - Part 4

2009-11-12T14:00:00.000-08:00

What an error! Can't believe the Mo chat has gone on this long without mention of one of the all time Mo-sporting legends...

Check this...

Burt Reynolds, legend, 'tache sporting, fast car driving, legend. Nice.

And just to prove that the car racing, 'tache sporting legendness wasn't a flash in the pan...

Cheers,

Col.

Famous Mo's of our time - Part 3

2009-11-11T13:05:00.000-08:00

Moving away from the sporting theme...if we think moustache, we do not often think sexy? or cool? except perhaps that is when dealing with one man....the one and only...Magnum...P...I...!!!

The coolest top lip ever to grace the big or small screen, Tom Selleck has done more for moustaches than any other celebrity, bar none. Whether as the inimitable Magnum PI or later as debonair Dr Richard Burke in Friends, Selleck has won the hearts of women the world over. If only my lip caterpillar carried such kudos!

Lastly, for those poor souls (mainly it would seem at my work!) who are too young to know what on earth I am talking about....

Mo' progress - Week 1

2009-11-06T14:45:00.000-08:00

Well, here we are at the end of week one. A pitiful amount of growth on my upper lip but at least some money in the bank! I can keep it secret no longer, so here goes....

1st Nov. Clean shaven (my face...)

Look a bit grumpy for some reason?

3rd Nov. - couple of days growth...

Then the pitiful weeks worth of 'tache (and under lip tickler)

Oh well, still three weeks to go...

Keep mo'ing,

Col.

Famous Mo's of our time - Part 2

2009-11-06T05:53:00.000-08:00

At the request of my team mate (Simon-man-chu) next we are going for the true King of 'taches, the one and only Merv Hughes! Australian fast bowler, hard man, drinking legend and sledging guru, Merv has all the attributes to be in our hall of fame.

Seen here in action against the luckless Graeme Hick, Hughes was the scourge of many an English batsman in the late eighties and early nineties. A hostile bowler, who loved a scrap, he was actually quite a student of the game and bowled with more intelligence than many of his contempories. He played in 53 test matches for Australia, taking 212 wickets. Indeed, following his playing career, Merv went on to be a selector for the Aussie national team.

Often overweight, a well known consumer of alcohol (and food) and always seen with the everpresent handlebar moustache - can there be a better contender for our hall of fame?

PS with all this talk of Hughes and the sledging he so loved. I have to add my favourite cricket sledge of all time, concerning that other well-loved Aussie fast bowler, Glenn McGrath.

The ever popular McGrath was playing against Zimbabwe and bowling at their portly former pace man Eddo 'Chicken' Brandes.

Brandes smears a couple of boundaries and McGrath shouts at him

"Why are you so f***#### fat?"

Eddo looks up and replies "Every time I f*** your wife she gives me a biscuit."

Love it...

How to donate

2009-11-06T02:36:00.000-08:00

If you would like to donate during Movember, here are a couple of ways you can do it.

give me some money next time you see me
online, via the Movember site.

go to http://uk.movember.com/
click on the 'Donate' tab
click on individual and type colin moulson or
on team and type mellow jonnys
and the rest is simple.

I am hoping to raise at least fifty bucks for a month of itchy top lip, so please help me out.

Cheers,

Col.

Famous Mo's of our time - Part 1

2009-11-06T01:36:00.000-08:00

Ask me about famous 'taches and the first name that comes to mind is this guy. A symbol of eighties football and eighties hardmen, the one and only Graeme Souness.

Growling around the Liverpool midfield as they took on all comers throughout Europe, Souness developed into a total legend and an icon of those times. Whether you are a Liverpool fan or not (I am definitely not) you had to admire his sheer determination and never say die attitude. Combining fearsome tackling and great long range shooting he epitomised the term 'engine room' and all the time he did it sporting the bushiest top lip wardrobe you had ever seen.

When I think about it, there is also a tinge of sadness too as he represents a great (and sadly lost) era of Scottish footballers who ruled Europe. They just don't seem to make them like that any more. Darren Fletcher or Graeme Souness? No offence Darren but I'd have the Yosser Hughes lookalike any day of the week....

Cheers,

Col.

Family ties...

2009-11-06T01:27:00.000-08:00

As I mentioned above, I was really hopeful that my bro and my Dad would accompany me on the mo' adventure. Unfortunately, they have both put forward incredibly poor excuses and have opted out. It is a shame but I shall tap them for sponsor money instead now!

In light of these developments, we can only guess what they would have looked like. Well, for my Dad, he is getting a bit old and a bit disheveled these days, so I guess something like this.....

As for my brother, he is blonde (pretty unusual once you think about it) with a touch of the ginger, so I am going for this....

Can you name the film?

(It is the pilot from 'Never Say Never Again' the renegade Bond film starring Sean Connery.)

Take care and happy mo'ing,

Col.

PS Got my first team member today! Simon, you are a legend. Keep it up big fella.

Movember

2009-11-01T12:36:00.000-08:00

I was reading the commuting section of the BikeRadar forum the other day (I now feel that I can legitimately read this section, as I do actually ride my bike to work sometimes...) and I stumbled across what I thought was a typo. The post was titled 'Movember'. On reading it, I realised that it wasn't a slip of the keyboard at all, more a call to arms for all red blooded males! Movember is all about men (or should that be real men?) growing moustaches (or mo's) during the course of November to raise awareness of prostate cancer.

Basically, you grow a furry top lip, look like an idiot, and any time anyone asks you what you were thinking, you ask them for a donation (£1?) I am looking to raise 50 quid over the month if I can. I have started a team (Mellow Jonnys) and have asked a few friends to join me on the caterpillar trail. Whether they will or not remains to be seen. Specifically, I have asked my Dad and my brother. I think it would be kind of cool to have three Moulson Mo's on the go...;-)

Today is day one, I am clean shaven, as instructed and will try and keep you updated on what appears over the next thirty days...

For more on Movember, please look here

http://uk.movember.com/

and for the 'Mellow Jonnys' page (apologies for the name, I was in a rush, blame my Dad) look here.

Happy growing,

Col.

Crank It!

2009-09-25T07:28:00.000-07:00

One former Olympian who has been in the news a bit lately is former rower James Cracknell. He featured in a cycling record attempt with another Olympian, rower turned cyclist Rebecca Romero. He has also been in the headlines as one of a trio of explorers (including Ben Fogle and another former rower Ed Coode) heading to the South Pole. This was documented in the BBC series On Thin Ice.

If you spend any time watching the former rower, you are instantly hit by what a driven individual he is. He throws himself wholeheartedly into whatever challenge he is undertaking. It has to be said, at the detriment of the rest of his life (usually in a description such as this it would say 'sometimes at the detriment of...' In the case of Mr Cracknell, I have deliberately ommitted the 'sometimes') Maybe this is what makes him such a great champion. After all, we are not all double Olympic champions.

Anyway, whatever you think of him, the reason I am writing about him is that James Cracknell is responsible for one of my favourite snippets from sport, ever. It is only short but sums up the moment fantastically well. It comes from the awesome autobiography of another rowing great, Matthew Pinsent, titled 'A Lifetime in a Race'

This is a great book, which I have read twice. It follows a format is a favourite of mine, the diary of events told through the athletes eyes. From the inside as it were. A real page turner. The final chapter of the book (or epilogue) covers the Athens Olympics of 2004 and Pinsent's quest for a fourth successive Olympic Gold medal. He is part of a coxless four crew (including Cracknell, Coode and Steve Williams) who have devoted at least four years to achieving gold...

Rowing is not a sport I know. Nor is it one I particularly follow but like most inhabitants of the UK, I have been swept up by the passion of Olympic rowing. Following the fortunes of Redgrave, Pinsent and Cracknell over the last few years. I hope Matt doesn't mind if I give you a taster of the book. It may inspire you to give it a read? (NB A bit of background first, in rowing the calls and direction are usually made by just one of the team (historically Redgrave in the team of four but now Steve Williams) the others usually staying silent and concentrating on the rowing.)

Ten twenty eight; the starter goes through the call over and turns on the lights. Staring at the red nothing dominates my thoughts more than the first stroke. Make it quick, make it deep.

I know we had a good start and our position relative to the Canadian's proves it, level if not a little up after ten strokes. 'Length' Steve calls, quiet almost. We get into our cruise, less energy than the start but the foot hasn't come off the gas much, if at all. Still level, maybe up a bit, then definitely up. 'Don't wait!' We had talked about this and made a point of the mistake we had made in Lucerne two months before. We had slowed after two minutes to row alongside the Canadians rather than keep forging ahead. But even though we are trying to get ahead, they are right there, a man down. 750 down and we are not going to drop them, but we are in position A. We had always felt that they put too much into the first half and we needed to be there to punish them in the second.

Halfway, '250 now'; it's a long drawn out effort, meant to last from the halfway mark to the next, a full 250 metres. We move and then stick, then they start coming back. This should be it, it should be easier from here on in.

'Two-fifty now'; another go at moving, they are just ahead, now we have actually lost ground on them. We are getting close to sprinting but not yet all in. Bad news is that we can't seem to shake them from their rythmn, can't get away. Good news, they can't either, it's right in the balance.

Five hundred to go, both boats fly through the last mark locked together. 'Crank it!' It's a different voice, it's James. His favourite call, one we dreamed up in altitude camp, it's the beginning of the charge. Crank encapsulates everything we want here, relentless, increasing power without losing length.

Four hundred, still together, still we can't get ahead enough to feel we are going to win for sure. The grandstands start on the left hand side, the roar begins. Okay, I think to myself, this is all over if we get a decisive move here, get a half-length and it's over. Give it 30 strokes, make them the best, as if everything rested on them and win it right here. I go for more power, more length again and start driving the oar through the water with all I've got. We talked about this before too, let's get everything out, let's empty the tank...

Did they win? You might know the answer already. I suggest you buy the book whatever. A great read and encapsulating from start to finish. I would copy the whole section here but risk getting in trouble with big Matt and I am guessing if we got into a discussion, he could take me...

Cracknell's 'Crank it!' is now locked away in my memory banks. I pull it out whenever I need that little bit more effort. Whether it is on the bike, in the gym or some other sporting endeavour, if I need just that little bit more, I know the ideal phrase to spur me on.

Take care,

Col.

PS I am going to be organising a charity fundraiser for the GT Foundation soon (watch this space) and an autographed copy of Matthew Pinsent's autobiography will be one of the prizes on offer.

One small step for man...

2009-08-14T03:29:00.000-07:00

Hello and welcome back to GT Winner!!!

It has been a while but we all deserve a rest every once in a while! It seems like an age ago that I was all wrapped up in the Etape Caledonia. What a ride and what a journey it was. Thanks again to all who contributed in both money and support.

You will no doubt be pleased to learn that it is not the end for GT Winner. I have more events planned (watch this space) and definitely more rides on the way. In the meantime, I would like to share a ride with you that was completed yesterday by someone other than me - my daughter, Skye.

Yesterday she rode her little pink bike for the first time without stabilizers! It was a very proud moment for us all and gave a huge sense of accomplishment.

I can still remember the first time I rode my bike by myself. So does my Dad. He was the one who let go of my saddle and let me ride free. Yesterday, the shoe was on the other foot as it were. I was struck by the sense of freedom there is from riding a bike, I still am today. There is nothing to beat the feeling speed and of the wind in your hair. I hope Skye gets as much pleasure from bike riding as I still do. I know as she sat down afterwards that she was very pleased with herself - and so she should be. What a girl!

There was another tinge of emotion simultaneous to the huge elation I felt at her achievement. At one point I was running alongside her, just in case of mishap. The increasingly confident (and always independent) Skye shouted to me to stop running and let her go. I did as I was told and watched her ride off into the distance. I was so proud but also aware, is this the start of my little girl really growing up...

It's good to be back,

Col.

GT Winner on GTF

2009-05-27T04:01:00.000-07:00

If you have a look here the Etape Caledonia ride details are now on the Geoff Thomas Foundation website. Thanks again to Becky for organising that. If you do decide to have a look, you will see that the GTF site is a very good one, with loads of info about the charity and its events. There are also a growing band of GTF fundraisers, which is great to see.

From a personal point of view, this is going to be the last few days of fundraising for the EC project. I will be adding up the total soon. Donations are still coming in (many thanks) and we may well reach the £2,000 mark yet!

Keep up the good work,

Col.

Post-race Photos

2009-05-23T05:06:00.001-07:00

Here are some pictures of the race finish courtesy of my mothers mobile phone (surprisingly clear I think). BTW my Ma thought I might have been missing the chocolate since January, so she brought me a little taste! (PS It is still untouched in the fridge at home)

There are a couple of things apparent to me. One is, "how small are my folks?" They must definitely be shrinking in old age. They never used to be that small...

Secondly (and on a slightly more serious note) I noticed my white lips in the last picture with my Dad. This is not due to any Tom Boonen type antics but rather dehydration. I mentioned before that my carefully planned eating and drinking schedule had been thrown off course by the unexpected stoppage and this seems to confirm it. I downed three bottles of water soon after the picture was taken.

This can happen to the best of us though. Lance Armstrong famously dehydrated in a long time trial stage of the 2003 Tour de France and nearly lost the race as a result. He has the white lip thing too.

Cheers for now,

Col.

The Support Team

2009-05-22T05:46:00.000-07:00

I have been caught up in the GT Winner project for about six months now. It has been quite a ride and has taken many twists and turns during that time. It has been very fulfilling but also hard work during that time. There were plenty of occasions where I would have preferred not to do the training, or not to write the blog and definitely times when I could have gone a bar of chocolate (still off it!). What I have realised is that you can't really do anything in life by yourself. You need back up. You need your support network. Fortunately, I am blessed with one of the best and it is time to give them a bit of a mention.

MY WIFE

I am one of the lucky ones. I love my wife more than I could ever write here and I am sure she feels the same. I very much look forward to us growing old and senile together. We are true life partners and despite her relative lack of cycling prowess, her input into this project has been invaluable.

As I have mentioned many times on these pages already, I would struggle to get through the day without Marnie keeping me organised. Therefore for a project like this, she was a necessity! Add to this the amount of time she has spent massaging both me and my battered ego over the last six months, plus her endless hours of childcare while I was away riding my bike and you have a key member of my team.

There is also one last piece of thanks I owe my wife. That is to say thank you for being there (in the infancy of our relationship it has to be said) during the dark times of the cancer, all those years ago. I truly couldn't have done it on my own and I will never forget who was my rock of support.

THE KIDS

If I thought I was lucky before, I wasn't even started! When you are lucky enough to have kids, it really does open your eyes as to what life is really all about. I absolutely adore my kids (Skye is nearly 4 and Ben coming up 2). They are both truly exceptional human beings in their own ways and I love watching them grow, almost visibly, by the day. They have spurred me on during the training and put up with their Dad being tired and grumpy!

Unbeknownst to them, they have also spurred me on in another way. I have tried not to lose sight of why I am raising this money and the thought that cancer can affect anyone, of any age, just doesn't bear thinking about.

MY FOLKS

As if putting up with me for eighteen years was not enough, always good for an adventure and a day out, my folks were my very own support team on the day. Bearing in mind that they had to drive up all the way from Lincolnshire the day before, this is no mean feet. Thanks Mum and Dad, especially for putting up with me being speechless at the finish for at least five minutes!

T-A CICLISMO

My companions for the weekend, Team T-A Ciclismo, are an awesome bunch of fellow cyclists. I truly could not have wished for a more hospitable group of guys to share my Etape Caledonia experience with. Before the event I had visions of wet canvas and damp sleeping bags. The reality was the lap of luxury and all my meals made for me. From Malcy's pasta, to the morning granola to the finest burgers in the whole of Pitlochry, I was definitely well catered for. Add in to this the friendly banter and a not inconsiderable sum of sponsor money and it was pre-ride utopia! Considering I had never met all but one of the guys before the weekend, their support was truly awesome. All I can say is, guys...chapeau! and same time next year...?

THE SCOTTS

Speaking of beds... The owners of my place to rest for the night were the very hospitable Scott's (Margaret and Peter), sister and brother in law of JJ, one of the TA guys. Not only did these lovely people agree to letting twelve or so sweaty cyclists camp out in their house for the night (they even moved next door) but they also put up with me and my folks after the ride (BTW - owners of the finest shower I have ever used, thanks Mags. Perhaps my judgement was slightly influenced by the occasion?) Below are (L-R) Pete, Mags and JJ.

Also, the TA guys had a whip round after the ride to pay for the inevitable clearing up that was required. Mags and Pete decided to donate this money to GTF. This is truly above and beyond the call of duty and shows what great characters they are. My thanks go to them both, on a personal level and on behalf of GTF. Thanks and any chance of a bed next year...?

WILLY BAIN

What is there left to say about this man? A true legend amongst bike mechanics. Well, there is one last thing. Not only did Willy assemble my new hot-rod in double quick time so that it was ready for the event, he even added some "go-faster" parts onto it...and he donated his fee for doing it to the GTF charity. Awesome work Willy, thanks!

BECKY AT GTF

I chose the GTF as my charity of choice for a number of reasons (see one of the first blog postings to find out why). This was long before I had the good fortune to be in touch with their campaign coordinator and PA to Geoff, Becky Frewing. Throughout the project Becky has been very helpful and encouraging and a pleasure to deal with. She has also helped me organise the next GT Winner project (coming soon, watch this space...)

THE STAFF

Last but not least, my work colleagues. These guys have put up with me being forgetful and disorganised lately (but that is no change from normal!) They have also helped with raising money by publicising the project. Thanks guys, couldn't have done it without you.

Finally, I must also say an enduring "Thank You" to anyone who has sponsored me for this challenge. I have been truly overwhelmed by everyone's generosity and have raised far more money than I expected. I know it is going to a good cause.

All the best,

Col.

Going the distance...

2009-05-19T04:53:00.000-07:00

I have made a shocking and rather unpleasant discovery over the last couple of days. Whilst reading some of the many reports on the sabotaged Etape Caledonia I have discovered that the race did not cover the complete distance. Apparaently, due to the potential danger caused by the tacks and due to the difficulty in clearing them from such a large area, the organisers decided to omit a small (about seven miles) section at the bottom of the climb. Here is an image of the route but due to my poor grasp of geography, I am not sure which bit it is?

Now, you would be forgiven for thinking that I should have noticed this before...and I kind of did. I remember thinking as we were passing the distance markers on the run in that they did not tally up with my cycling computer but to be honest, you are kind of busy with other things at the time! The other variable was that I had ridden from the campsite to the start, so my computer wasn't starting at zero (incase you are wondering, two reasons for this. I was going to set a personal best for distance, so wanted to know how far I had gone in total. Secondly, I had half an eye on doing 100 miles, a cycling landmark).

So, here is the real rub. I feel I have raised money for charity (GTF) during this project, with the objective being that I would ride the 81 mile Etape Caledonia. Now, depending on how you look at it, I have or haven't done this. I rode the whole event (as it was on the day). It looks as though I have ridden 81 miles too (73 or so in the event and another 8 going to and from the campsite) Here is a picture of my computer to confirm the distances I travelled. They are not 100% accurate, so rounding to the nearest whole number, 81 miles.

However, if anyone who has donated feels short changed in any way, you most certainly have the option of letting me know. I will not be confirming a final total raised for a few days, so there is plenty of opportunity to get in touch. I promise that if there had been the opportunity to ride the extra distance, I would have done it. The whole thing is a bit unsavoury and leaves a bad taste in the mouth but I guess that's life. I entered into the event in good faith, it is just a shame some circumstances beyond my control affected the day. I guess I will just have to do it again next year...

All the best,

Col.

Etape Caledonia 2009 (Part 2)

2009-05-18T01:05:00.000-07:00

It is now the morning after the night before. I am happy to report that I am still in one piece, although walking seems to have taken on a new level of difficulty (and in true Fawlty Towers stylie, just don't mention the stairs - imagine Herr Flick from Allo Allo and you are about there!) Suffice to say that my right knee in particular is letting me know what it thought of yesterdays antics. More on that later.

I thought I would expand a little on my short post from last night and add in some pictures. Just to truly give a flavour of the event.

REGISTRATION

I picked up my hire car on Saturday. I had booked a nice big estate car with plenty of room for one, if not two bikes. Only to arrive and be greeted with a Ford Fiesta! Not to worry. It meant I had to decide which bike I was going to use as I could only take one. I think this prevented some on the day procrastination, so was actually beneficial. I decided to take the new steed and was truly vindicated in this decision during the event. All my stuff only just fitted in, even with no other passengers. Who would have thought you needed so much stuff just for a bike ride...

One of the provisos for entry into the Etape Caledonia is that all participants must register the day before the event. I drove up for around 6pm and was greeted by the sight of cyclists everywhere. Almost every second car seemed to be carrying a bike or two. Riding, walking, chatting, shopping, it appeared everyone in the town had the same shared passion for two wheels and it was a great sight. I registered (very quick and extremely well organised) and collected my timing chip.

ACCOMMODATION

For most people this pre-race registration also means an over night stay in or around Pitlochrie. I mentioned a while ago how I struggled to get a bed for the night but by a quirk of fate, I fell right on my feet! A chance e-mail put me in touch with an old friend Ed Lindsay. He is the (self-elected?) leader of a group of cyclists calling themselves "Team Affluent" (more on these guys later). Fortunately for me the TA boys had the Etape Caledonia down as their first event of the summer. Ed very kindly offered for me to bunk in with them. I expected this to mean a night under wet canvas but nothing could have been further from the truth. I stayed in a lovely holiday home on the Faskally campsite, owned by one of the teams sister and brother in law (more on this great couple later too).

RACE DAY

I had a comfy (if short) bed and slept reasonably well considering. I awoke at about 5 am. It was damp but not raining. A good breakfast and a bit of bike prep and then it was time to get ready. It was now raining, so clothing choice was getting more difficult. I eventually chose to wear knee warmers with my shorts and to take my rain cape (horrid to ride in, very sweaty but useful while I waited around for my turn to start - and again later in the day, unbeknownst to me at the time!) I shunned the over shoes (in some way they just offend me aesthetically?) a decision I rued for the first few miles as I had really cold, wet feet! Here I am before the start.

We cycled down to the start as a team. Most of the TA boys were off early doors, so I got to watch the myriad of cyclists setting off before me. What a true celebration of two wheels the EC really is. Men, women, road bikes, mountain bikes, recumbents, tandems, you name it, they were all there. What I found particularly interesting was the true mixture of cyclists. In some groups you had true roadies with their carbon bikes and deep section carbon wheels lining up right next to a seventy year old in baggy shorts with his pannier clad touring bike. Awesome. Despite the drizzle at that stage, everyone seemed in good spirits and the organisation was again first class (as it was throughout, despite the unforeseen problems ahead).

Once I got going it was a case of trying to find a rhythm. As I suspected, at that late stage there was little in the way of group riding. I tried to find riders of similar pace but the course is quite undulating at the start, so there are lots of changes of pace and it can be tricky to ride with other riders.

Eventually I met a guy called Alex (riding a blue Trek) with whom I had a nice chat. I was trying to just stay relaxed and not worry too much about time or distance travelled. I then met another nice chap, Bruce, from Edinburgh who I road a good few miles with. We had a great chat on a range of subjects including football, rugby, cycling and work. It really helped to pass the time. By this point we had probably ridden about 25 miles. I still hadn't been in a bunch, or really drafted anyone (if you remember from previous posts, riding in another riders slipstream can save up to 33% of your energy. I would certainly vouch for this after yesterday!)

As luck would have it, I found what I was looking for. Two large blokes, riding at a good speed. Due to my size I need a larger rider to shelter behind and these guys were perfect. I didn't get their names but yellow Giant riding man and particularly Cervelo riding blue jacket man - chapeau and thank you! I proceeded to get a lovely tow for a good ten miles along the Loch side. Awesome views, sunshine and passing people all the way. It doesn't get much better than that. Once I had drained their energy I took my turn at the front and made some further headway. I was just getting psyched up for the big climb when disaster struck...

Up until now there had been a couple of minor roadside incidents. Crashes, feed stations, punctures etc. but this was a big hold up. The entire field seemed to be coming to a standstill. We all dismounted and rather demoralising, I met all the people I had ridden past already! At this point, I still thought it would be a short stoppage - maybe the feed station was busy? or another crash? so I went for a pee.

As I documented yesterday (see previous post) it was much more than that. We were held up for a long time. As I said, it was just after 10.00am when I stopped and 11.50am when I got going again. During that time we advanced about a mile down the road (I should factor this into my time, which I forgot yesterday). I won't talk too much about this period other than to say it was cold, windy but sunny and not wet. Almost all of the riders were confused, dismayed but not aggressive, despite their anger at the mindless actions of the minority. The locals of Loch Rannoch were brilliant. They provided tea, coffee and shelter (even using their own mugs!) and were very understanding.

Now, this is important. If you were to ask a non-cyclist or non-athlete whether they would like a long break in the middle of an event, they would probably say yes. Following my experiences yesterday, I would definitely say this is a hindrance rather than a help. During the stoppage I got cold, I got hungry (I had a very pre-planned eating and drinking schedule that was going very well but planned for five hours, not six!) and my legs stiffened up. Prior to the stoppage, I was going really well and was nicely warmed up for the big climb. When we re-started I was cold and there were bikes everywhere, all going at different speeds. In particular, my knee was giving me jip straight away.

I managed to get over the climb and hooked onto two guys going at a good speed. It is quite a long, stepped climb but not too steep. The main difficulty was finding the rhythm again and trying to combat the feeling of having to make up for lost time. The descent was fun, if windy. Open roads really are the way forward!

Next came my biggest stroke of luck. I was falling low on energy and knew there was still a way to go (30 miles?) I needed a group...and I got one. In this situation names are irrelevant. There is just you and the wheel infront. I decided that wheel was mine and I was staying there. The group was about six strong - Etape Caledonia jersey man, Assos jacket man, Sweden jersey man, Dave Raynor Fund man, me and our spiritual leader - Endura tights, dhb jersey, red Principa riding lady. Yep, four blokes and me all got towed for mile after mile by a very smooth pedalling young lady. To you my dear, chapeau and many thanks. For the only time in the ride, we got a bit of "through and off" going on and the pace was way, way higher than I would have manged solo. The sun was out, the scenery was stunning but to be honest, I was a long way away by now. My world had closed in to leave just the tyre two inches infront and the screaming pain coming from my thighs every time we went even slightly up hill.

We rode as a group almost to the end, where a series of truly brutal short, steep climbs really signs off with a bang. This is definitely the hardest part of the route! Then, before I knew it, I was coming in to the finish. Pitlochry was full of cheering people. I actually slowed down on purpose as I came into the barriered section. I wanted to soak up the moment. I had been thinking about this for six months and I wanted to savour the occasion. I looked around and my emotions were all over the place. I crossed the line and a lovely lady presented my with a medal and said how well I had done. It appeared so heartfelt, I almost hugged her!

My folks had come to watch and they were just after the finish. Unfortunately, I couldn't speak for about five minutes but I drank three bottles of water and then was a bit more with it. Here is me after the finish, with my medal!!!

There is much more to say but that is enough for today. As I said yesterday, I am very pleased and very proud. Thanks again to everyone who made it possible. I will continue to post over the next few days about everything and everyone involved.

Chapeau,

Col.

Etape Caledonia 2009

2009-05-17T13:39:00.000-07:00

Wow. What a day. What a truly amazing, unforgettable day. Certainly a "once in a lifetime". Some of you may already know what happened but if not, here it is...

I am going to have to keep this brief (I am practically falling asleep on the laptop-promise to write more tomorrow) so here goes...

I set off in wet conditions in the last group (group X - they went in alphabetical order, so you can easily figure out how far down the field I was! If nothing else, there would be plenty of people to aim at). By this time I had freezing fingers and toes and was praying the weather wasn't going to be horrible. However, it soon warmed up and the sun came out and the first 40 miles or so were very enjoyable and passed mainly without significant problems. Then this happened...

I cannot believe that anyone in the whole field of 3,500 people anticipated this happening! (or was really prepared for it) The actions of a mindless few threatened to spoil the whole event for the rest. Spraying the road with carpet tacks is irresponsible and very dangerous. Never mind punctures, this could have lead to crashes and as it was on the fastest part of the course, maybe even fatalities. We have been lucky. I only hope the police can find the culprits. Bearing in mind that local people lined the whole route and to a man cheered us on, this is definitely not an accurate reflection of the local people of Perthshire.

Eventually, after a long, cold break, we got going again. I managed over the big climb and got in some good groups on the way home to the finish. The route definitely has a sting in the tail!

For me, the facts are something like this. I eventually finished the event. I managed to cycle the whole 81 mile course (some earlier riders had to be re-directed and didn't get this opportunity). It took me approximately 6 hours in total, of which I was stood around for about 2 hours, so in reality just over four hours.

My timing chip says I took 05.52.48 and I timed that I was stood from 10.02 to 11.50, so working that out I was riding for about 4hours and 5 minutes. Either way, much faster than I anticipated. With this I am really pleased. I feel very proud and a great sense of achievement. I will sleep well tonight and it is in no small part due to the people that have donated to the project that I have such a good feeling of success. Thanks to you all.

Sleep well (I will) and thanks again,

Colin.

Route Fly Through

2009-05-15T12:55:00.000-07:00

2 days to go...

2009-05-15T12:38:00.000-07:00

Only two days to go now and I am starting to dread the thought of Sunday. Sorry to be doom and gloom at this late stage but this is due to a combination of factors.

I am feeling a little under pressure (the fundraising is going really, really well and thank you to everyone who has dipped into their pockets over the last week, it is all really appreciated) but this does mean that the stakes are being ramped up. Also, the weather has taken a definite turn for the worst (gone is our mini-heatwave back is the familiar rain).

However, I don't think these are the primary reasons for my malaise. I think this has another cause, namely the fact that I am averaging about four hours sleep a night. My son, Ben, is unfortunately not well and has been up most nights over the last week. Add to this the fact that his sister, Skye, has a hacking cough and I wouldn' be surprised if I am coming down with something...aarghh!

It's not all doom and gloom though. The new bike has arrived and Willy has truly pulled out all the stops and got it on the road for me (despite an ill fitting seatpost shim, he just made a new post appear "as if by magic" just like the shop keeper in Mr Ben!). Took it for a test ride this morning (not far, about 15 miles) and I can happily report that it rides like a dream. It is comfortable, fast and handles perfectly. The biggest revelation surprisingly though has to be the new Campagnolo Veloce groupset - what a stunner. Multiple up and down shifts, front and rear, even under load. A huge improvement on anything I have ridden before. I just hope the crappy Scottish weather isn't going to go and get it all dirty!

Anyway, I am off to finish packing my bags. I pick up the hire car tomorrow lunchtime and then it is off to Pitlochry to meet up with the support crew (TA you know who you are!), register and try to get some sleep.

I may not get to post again before the ride, so once again thank you all and wish me luck...

Cheers,

Col.

The Final Week

2009-05-13T13:35:00.000-07:00

Well, the day of reckoning is nearly upon us. I am well into the final week of my preparations for the Etape Caledonia 2009. There are now four days to go...

I have the week off work (by lucky coincidence) and have been to my warm weather training camp...in Ayrshire! (we have spent the last three days at Seamill Hydro. Who would have thought you could feel this far away from everything just 45 minutes from the front door?). All joking aside, we have had glorious weather. The kids had a great time and are wonderfully sun-kissed. Very relaxing indeed.

In actual fact it was no training camp - I didn't take the bike. I am obeying the rules of relaxation this week and hoping to save all my energy for the big day. Only problem I am having is that I seem to be confusing "pre-ride carbo-loading" with "stuffing my face full of cr@p!"

Weather forecast (despite our current heatwave) is not good for Pitlochry at the weekend. Looks like it will be wet. Oh well, at least no chance of sunstroke and no excuse to be distracted by the scenery!

New bike frame arrived today. I haven't seen it yet as it got delivered to work. I will take it to Willy tomorrow. I very much doubt I will use it on the big day (especially if it is raining!) as I want to have a chance to familiarise myself with it and there just isn't time. Not to worry, I will take my best legs instead...

Cheers,

Col.

bicyclerepair.co.uk

2009-05-09T03:48:00.000-07:00

If you are going to ride a bike, you soon figure out that it will need a bit of maintenance along the way. This starts off with keeping it clean, then progresses to oiling the chain and...before you know it...you are wondering whether the headset bearings are integrated or not!

This is a journey I have been on over the last few years and the next dawning realisation you will have is that you need a reliable LBS. LBS is cyclo-speak for "Local Bike Store". No matter how confident you are at bicycle maintenance (as I have mentioned before, I positively enjoy getting my hands dirty), there will come a point where a lack of knowledge or tools will have you seeking expert help. I am very fortunate to have just that expert, right on my doorstep.

Close to both my work and home is bicyclerepair.co.uk. This is a store run by ace bike mechanic, Willy Bain. It is an unusual bike shop in that it does not sell bikes. Instead, it concentrates on providing bicycle maintenance and repair and selling all manner of cycling accessories. Willy stocks a seemingly ever increasing range of cycling accoutrement's from parts, to nutrition supplements, to clothing, to lighting, to helmets and much more. I have been impressed recently with the expansion of his ranges, particularly for clothing. As you can probably tell, I spend an unhealthy amount of time hanging around the shelves of bicyclerepair. It is a fault I am happy to admit to and plan to continue (even if Willy is not so sure!)

Willy truly is a bike genius. There seems to be little that he doesn't know how to sort. I am sure he has forgotten more about bikes than many of us will ever know. Whether it is a simple or complex task, he seems to tackle it with ease. Many is the time I have sweated and thrashed over something for hours, only to take it in to Willy and him sort it in two seconds! He even guided me through my first attempt at wheel-building recently (I am very proud of the rear wheel on my fixie these days!) and if he can do that, he must know what he is on about!

The shop is always full of bikes (and often full of bikies too. One of the things you soon realise if you ride a bike around South Glasgow is that everyone knows Willy and they all seem to like hanging around in his shop - especially me) of all different kinds. I thought at first that this must be some kind of summer rush but I have come to realise that no matter what the season, bikes will need repaired! I am sure I read somewhere that Willy knows about all forms of two-wheeled transport and I can vouch for this having seen the plethora of machines that regularly fill his store. These range from children's scooters, to the most blinging carbon time trial bike I have ever seen! I even once saw a tandem combining upright and recumbent sections in there!

So, to paraphrase the Ghostbusters, if your bike needs sorted..."Who you gonna call...?"

Happy Riding,

Col.

bicylerepair.co.uk can be found at 359 Pollokshaws Road and on the phone 0141 423 9010.

35

2009-05-08T02:40:00.000-07:00

It's my birthday...today...I am 35...and I am really, really...happy about it!

Sometimes it pays to take a step back and look around. I have been trying to do that a bit more lately and do you know what? I like what I see. I am a very lucky man. I have a beautiful wife, whom I love very much and who I know loves me (that is a very special thing and not as common as you might think). I have the two most fantastic kids I have ever clapped eyes on (they really are truly remarkable and having my son sing happy birthday to me this morning while my daughter ripped open my presents at the speed of light, really amazing). I live in a lovely house and I am reasonably secure financially. All in all, I have everything I could have possibly wished for at this age.

Above all though, I realise that I am very fortunate to be fit and healthy and able to enjoy all of these aspects of my life. Long may it continue.

Please have a drink on me tonight,

Col.

Weather

2009-05-08T02:06:00.000-07:00

Everything I read about the Etape Caledonia 2008 includes pictures of idyllic Scottish countryside filled with happy cyclists, dappled in glorious sunshine. It seems that the weather last year was absolutely perfect. Just right for an early morning ride. Not too hot, not too cold.

I have obviously been praying all year for something similar. However, it is looking less like this is going to happen... The weather here has been awful for the last few weeks. It is cold, windy and wet (and then some). This doesn't normally bother me too much (if you don't ride in the wet in Glasgow, you don't really ride much at all!) but it is getting a bit silly.

I got home from my ride on Wednesday night to find a huge puddle in the middle of my lawn and two of the local ducks swimming in it! You can see the male of the duo in the picture having a little sit down under my kids climbing frame!

I guess you have to be a little bit mad to be a cyclist and I certainly felt it that night. Everyone else was rushing to their cars or homes after work. I chose to go on a training ride to the Glennifer Braes! Probably not my wisest move but I felt good about it once I was finished. I wanted to check a couple of things before the EC came around.

I wanted to check what kit would work best in the wet (I certainly got a chance to check that!) and to check my climbing form (I haven't been riding too many hills recently, just because of route choices). The good news was that I felt good on the climb. I rode it in 11.38, which is almost two minutes faster than when I last did it in February. I also managed to climb a significant proportion out of the saddle, another pleasing factor. Just hope I climb as well on the day, Shehallion is a bit bigger than the Braes though...

Only 9 days to go,

Col.

Tour de Force

2009-05-07T05:48:00.000-07:00

I have always been a lover of sporting non-fiction. In the run up to the Etape Caledonia this has escalated above even my normal levels. I have practically been devouring any literature to do with cycling. It was due to this that I stumbled upon the excellent Tour de Force by Daniel Coyle. I was in my local Borders and I had pretty much read everything else in the cycling section! I was to be pleasantly surprised. It is an excellent book and surprising in it's honesty. I would have imagined that a book like this, written by someone close to Armstrong, and privy to his personal affairs would have been very bland and controlled. Not so. Coyle gives a detailed account of his time in the Armstrong camp (he and his family moved to Spain and followed Armstrong for a year - no mean feat in itself!) without offering any rigid opinions on what is going on. He allows the reader to make up their own mind. His writing style is excellent and as a result the book will appeal to cyclists and non-cyclists alike.

I have a couple of favourite bits from the book, that I will share with you. Coyle speaks at length about Armstrong's training methods and in particular his relationship with the infamous doctor Michele Ferrari (the good doctor is widely regarded as a doping genius. He has been charged in the past with doping offences pertaining to cyclists and Armstrong has latterly tried to distance himself from Ferrari following public out cry). Interestingly, Armstrong also has another well known trainer, Chris Carmichael, who has made a fortune from his association with the Tour de France champ. It is an interesting area and here is a section from the book on the subject.

Whatever the balance*, it was clear that Armstrong was close to both men; both served his needs in their own way.

*To explore this question, I took a poll. Here are the results:

US Postal Directeur Johan Bruyneel (diplomatically): "I would say that both Ferrari and Carmichael are important to Lance. Each in their own way."

Armstrong Agent Stapleton (emphatically): "Ferrari's the trainer but Carmichael is the coach. He's got final say."

Postal Team Chiropractor Spencer (carefully): "Ferrari's brilliant, and I think there's no doubt that Lance listens to him carefully. On the Tour, I can say that Carmichael is just not that involved. I think he's busy with TV stuff."

Current Postal team mate Landis (incredulously): "Come on. You've met them both. Who would you listen to?"

Former team mate Vaughters (knowingly): "That is a very interesting question. There are a lot of people who would say that is THE question."

I particularly like Landis' comment. However, my favourite part of the book covers a different topic altogether. It is when Coyle describes the riders preparation for the Tour de France. It describes a level of conditioning unknown to almost all humans...

"A privileged equilibrium between quality of muscles, acuity of intelligence and force of shear character," the French philosopher and writer Roland Barthes called it. Stepping out onto the razor, the riders call it, a journey into the realm of physiological irony. On the bike, they feel invincible; the pedals seem to float. Off it, they move slowly, delicately. Body fat plummets to malnutritive levels, they are hollow cheeked and paper-skinned; they might get out of breath climbing a short flight of stairs. White blood cell counts drop by 30 per cent; their bodies become vulnerable to all manner of colds and disease. They push elevator buttons with their elbows to avoid germs. They sniffle. They live on the boundary between pathetic sickness and intoxicating power. They push, like Icarus, to see how high they can fly.

I love the term "stepping out onto the razor". I wish I were approaching that level in my preparations. Unfortunately, the only razor I need worry about is the one hovering over my leg hair. But then that's another story...

Col.

Fundraising Update

2009-05-06T02:49:00.000-07:00

We are at less than two weeks to the big day now. My nerves are starting to jangle. I am feeling pretty good about the ride itself and I am still really looking forward to it. However, I am feeling a little pressure due to the amount that is riding on it (pardon the pun), quite literally.

So far we have raised just over £1500. This is an awesome amount and I have been truly overwhelmed by everyone's generosity. I have received donations from friends, family and associates. I have even received donations from people who I have never met! Some people have donated because they know me. Some because they know the disease. Either way I am very, very grateful and just hope that I can do them all proud.

If you would like to donate, please visit the fundraising page here.

Take care,

Col.

The Bike

2009-05-02T07:40:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe that I have gotten this far and I have not yet really mentioned the bike. After all, I would struggle to do the Etape Caledonia without one! For me one of the great things about cycling is that it provides dual enjoyment. Yes, I love riding my bike but I also just love bikes...

Over the last couple of years in particular, I think I have spent as much time building and mending bikes as I have riding them! I think it is a man thing. We all seem to like to have a passion or hobby that we can get truly over-indulgent about. For some men it is cars, for some it is computers but for me it is definitely bikes. There is something about the cogs and sprockets and oil and grease of it all that just appeals. I blame my Dad, who has always been an inveterate tinkerer and DIY kind of guy.

Now, if you were thinking of buying a bike, there are (broadly speaking) two ways that you could go about it. You can buy a complete bike from a bike shop (as most sensible/ normal people would do) or you can buy it piece by piece and then build it all up into your pride and joy. This second route is definitely not cost effective (or time efficient for that matter) but it does provide almost limitless scope for pouring over catalogues and websites of components and specifying each individual part just the way you want it. I could spend hours (what do I mean could, I do spend hours, just ask my wife) pouring over cycling magazines looking at the specifications of various bikes and components. What more could a man dream of...

When I returned to cycling about ten years ago, I purchased a cheap Claud Butler road bike from the guys at Craig McMartin's on Pollokshaws Road. It was a good starting point (both from the point of view of riding and my introduction to bike "fettling"). I then went on to a Specialized Allez (lovingly bought for me as a birthday present by my wife). This was/ is an awesome bike. It may have a relatively low spec by some peoples standards but I have always loved it. It has suited me well irrespective of the type of riding. I have used it for general riding, racing, time trialling and it is currently in use as my winter bike with mudguards and panniers.

As I started riding (and reading) more, I began to lust after a faster bike (This is an interesting concept in itself as the thing that makes the most difference to how fast a bike goes is nothing to do with the hardwear, ie the rider!). I was so impressed with the Specialized Allez that I was keen to keep the same frameset. There are bikes higher up in the range than the one I had but none of them tickled my fancy. I searched around and managed to find a frame only deal that was the same as mine from what was Oldham Cycles. I duly bought it and set about choosing the components.

I wanted to give Campagnolo a try rather than the all pervasive Shimano groupsets. At the time, there were no Specialized bikes with Campag(nolo) components. I have always been a sucker for aesthetics as far as bikes are concerned. Things have to match. No purple bar tape and red saddles for me. The theme for this bike was black and white, styled on the La Pierre bikes ridden by the Francais Des Jeux team at the time. Bearing this in mind, I chose a black groupest, Campag Mirage. Not the best by any stretch but visually awesome and the poor mans Record! I asked Glasgow's finest bike mechanic, Willy to order a groupset for me and to build the bike up (this was one bike I wanted to be perfect, so no home build here). I chose Campag Vento wheels to keep the theme going throughout the bike. Finishing kit was mainly Specialized, with a carbon pave seatpost and stem.

I think the outcome was near perfect. The bike looks awesome and rides like a dream. It is light (comparitively), smooth and comfortable. It gives off a real air of speed. I think (I am being very honest here, particularly bearing in mind what is to come) I would be happy riding this bike for many years. It suits perfectly the type of rides that I do, usually one or two hours with no huge climbs.

However, when I signed up for the Etape Caledonia, my mind obviously started to wander...(as I said, boys love their toys) To give you some background to my musings, there is a theory that Aluminium (from which the Specialized is made) can give a slightly harsh ride. I have steel framed bikes (a very forgiving material) and I can vouch that the ride is definitely different. It is a slightly softer, less twitchy experience. Does this take away from the feeling of speed? Hard to say. The general feeling (within the cycling community) is that Aluminium is not a great frame material for riding long distances. For this type of riding, the preferred materials are steel, titanium or carbon. Carbon is theoretically perfect as it has a very high strength to weight ratio and can be formed into nearly any shape. For me, titanium is just something to be lusted after as it is outwith my price range...)0:

So it was that I plumped for a new bike (in reality it had as much to do with the fall in the Bank of England base rate as it did my mood!) I have always admired the Specialized Roubaix (a carbon, high spec version of my Allez, specifically designed for riding longer distances) but they have changed it a bit recently and I am not so keen. It is also pretty dear for what it is. Then I saw a new kid on the block, the Ribble Sportive Carbon. I saw it and instantly had to have one...

The only problem is that a few hundred other folk seem to have had the same idea. The bike has been sold out for months. I telephoned the guys at Ribble (they were very helpful) and was advised that the frame should be back in stock at the end of April (it turns out they were coming from the Far East - Taiwan? and Ribble had paid for air freight rather than sea to try and get them quicker). Unfortunately, April has come and gone and still no bike. I have all of the components and the wheels, just no frame...

I think they may have now arrived in the UK. I may still take delivery of it before the Etape. However, it will still need to be assembled and there is a limit to the number of favours I can ask of Willy. Also, do I really want to be riding 81 miles on a bike I have never sat on before? I am not sure. I would ideally have liked to get at least some training in on it before the event. I suppose these questions will all get answered over the next week or so but it is looking more likely that the Sportive Carbon will be a very nice finishing prize, rather than my steed for the day. Not to worry, it is the legs that count really...(0:

Happy riding,

Col.

Fat Boy

2009-05-02T05:55:00.000-07:00

Last night I had my weekly visit to my own personal torturer, Gordon (aka my personal trainer - see previous post on Impact Fitness). This particular visit was important as I was due to have my body measurements taken.

I will try and explain. As a way of monitoring his clients fitness, and to help set them achievable goals, Gordon takes body measurements from each of them at their first visit. These can then be repeated at a later date to check for improvements. I had my measurements taken about a year ago, when I had my first Impact Fitness session.

The measurements include standard parameters such as height, weight and "circumference measurements" (waist, chest, bicep, quads, calf etc.) . There is also a measurement of body fat. This is done using what looks like a large pair of pliers that are used to grip your various spare tyres! A calculation is then done to determine your percentage body fat.

Now, before I reveal the results, I should say that I have been feeling pretty good about myself recently. I have definitely lost weight since I began my training. I can feel it in my body and I notice a difference in my clothes (my jeans don't fit). Having said that, I have not been having a particularly great week. I've been a bit under the weather, I guess with a virus (my son has not been well either over the last couple of weeks and we are a very caring family...). This, combined with some truly Glasgow-esque weather, has scuppered my plans for a long ride this week (I did go to cycling club on Wednesday and had a great time. Forty miles, including my first "race pace" group riding of the year but this has definitely been the exception rather than the rule this week).

So, before last nights session, I wasn't feeling at my peak but then I guess we all have bad weeks, or bad days. I was having what Bridget Jones would called a "fat day". My diet had not been particularly good and, as I said, I was feeling a little under-exercised. Not a great mental state of affairs for such an ordeal but hey-ho. It turns out that I have a body fat percentage of 20.3%. This seems like an awfully high number to me but Gordon assures me it is not too bad. It places me in the Good category (the categories being Poor-below average-good-very good and excellent). I suppose I should be pleased although it is higher than I had hoped for (my perception has definitely been skewed by an article in Cycling Weekly last week, where one rider had the bizarre level of 1.5% - truly abnormal) I guess what is important is whether it is an improvement on last year? I will look out the other figures and let you know...

Col.

The Cancer (Part 2)

2009-04-24T06:08:00.000-07:00

Firstly, I have only had cancer once. I only intend to have it once too (touch wood). However, I think there is more to say on the subject than I have already posted, so here goes...

There are many reasons why people write blogs. I know I have many reasons for doing so (too much time on my hands?). One of the reasons for me writing GT Winner was partly to provide a degree of self-help type stuff, on those topics us men are so crap at talking about and so happy to ignore. I know it has been at least a partial success on this front as recently one of my female friends remarked to me

"...great blog Col. If I had any testicles, I would have had them out for a feel straight away..."

Such is the theme of today's post.

It turns out (I didn't know this until much later) that one of the main reasons for me developing testicular cancer when I was 25 years old, was something that happened much earlier in my life. When I was born I suffered from a very common birth defect known as cryptorchidism, or undescended testicle. This affects 3% of full-term or 30% of premature infant boys. It can affect one or both testes (for me it was just the one) and is one of the most common birth defects (and the most common of involving the male genitalia).

In my case, it was discovered that I had cryptorchidism when I was about three years old. I vaguely remember it, so I cannot have been that young. I underwent surgery and the testicle was re-positioned in the scrotum. The mis-placed testicle can lie in various places depending on how far it got on the journey of descent. In my case, it was in the abdominal region, below my belly button. I remember relatively little about the hospital stay, although I remember vividly returning to hospital to have my stitches removed and crying bitterly because I didn't want the nurse to see my willy! (again another sign that I can't have been that young!)

I know for a fact that both my parents and I thought that once the surgery was completed, that was the end of the saga. My mother swears that at no point was the possibility of cancer mentioned or discussed in any way. This is more than a little odd as it seems well documented in the literature that undescended testicle does significantly increase the chances of a patient developing testicular cancer at a later stage. With a history of one undescended testicle, your risk is about four times higher than that of a man with both testicles descended normally (about 1:120 compared to the norm at 1:480 for both testes affected it is 1:44). More information can be seen here

So all in all, I was lucky that I found the problem when I did. It would have been nice to have the "heads up" that I might develop a problem as I got older. I certainly think this knowledge would make affected individuals a bit more scrupulous about checking themselves regularly. I would hope that in the modern age, counselling post-cryptorchidism is better than it seems to have been when I was a boy.

Take care and happy self-examination boys and girls...

Col.

Prologue

2009-04-23T01:24:00.000-07:00

Last night saw my long awaited return to the competitive world of club cycling. The first club night of the season (usually just after the clocks have changed) is a key date in the cycling diary. For a member of The Glasgow Nightingale Cycling Club it is marked by the running of the Prologue time trial.

(NB the word Prologue is derived from Ancient Greek and means preface or preceding the main matter. In cycling, it is usually a short time trial at the start of a longer event - such as the Tour de France - used to order and position riders. For our club it helps us order ourselves into groups for subsequent training rides over the summer.)

I decided to ride over to the race. It takes place in and around Torrance, on the North of the city. From my house it is about ten miles give or take a little bit. I hoped that this would help me warm up but would also let me get more miles in the legs leading up to the Etape Caledonia ride. The weather was slightly overcast but dry.

On the way over I met fellow club member Tom Worthington on Great Western Road. He was on his way home from work to change, ready for the race. Tom is a Nightingale stalwart and a great guy. He is a true bikey with a love of all things cycling related. I don't know whether Tom drives a car (I doubt it) but he seems to have truly taken the bike to his heart and integrated it into his daily life. On this occasion he was cycling along in his "civvies", trousers rolled to keep them away from the chain, bag slung over shoulder. We had a quick chat and Tom headed off.

One of the interesting parts of the evening for me was as Tom and I turned a corner into Queen Margaret Drive. We were side by side, me in my race gear, Tom in his ordinary clothes, both on race bikes. We set off together but within one corner and only a couple of pedal strokes Tom was bike lengths ahead of me and looking around. I don't know if it was his line through the corner or the fluidity of his riding but Tom (the seasoned racer) had, unbeknownst to him, given me a reminder that I have much to learn...

Tom has his own blog here:
http://theweering.blogspot.com/

As I arrived at the club house I could see quite a crowd of expectant riders, mostly kitted out in the new 'Gale jerseys. These have a really classy look about them and it is great to see so many club members supporting the club in this way. I felt I stuck out a bit as I was all decked out in my bright green Geoff Thomas kit.

I gave my name to the starter, Jim Reid (all clubs need a Jim to survive. A club member for seemingly forever, he is always helping out us younger riders and events such as the prologue would not be possible without him) and was given number 13 on the start list (unlucky for some but actually my lucky number and my shirt number during my hockey days. An omen...?)

Riding a time trial is a difficult business. It obviously requires extremes of physical effort but it is also quite a mentally challenging act. Maintaining concentration is difficult, particularly when your body is so focused on other things. Also in the mix is the need to maintain the correct levels of effort. This is surprisingly challenging. One of my worries prior to the prologue ride was whether I would be able to control my effort to cover the whole course (the last time I rode the event I went off too fast at the start and blew up half way round). Some riders use power meters or heart rate monitors to control their efforts. I chose to go with good old fashioned "feel" (the battery was flat in my HRM!). Would I be able to go hard enough but without going over the "red line"? I knew time would tell...

The course is approximately 5.5 miles in length. It is in four sections - an uphill drag to begin, followed by a fast descent, then a hard hilly section followed by the run in to the finish. I waited in line (shivering in the cold after removing all unnecessary clothing) and soon it was my turn to start. The starter gave a short countdown and then I was off...

Riders are set off at minute intervals. It is always good if you can see the rider in front as this lends some incentive to the chase. As I went up the initial drag I could see my minute man off in the distance. I could even convince myself I was catching him. Once I reached the roundabout and began to descend the second section, he was nowhere in sight. I couldn't believe the irony. A heavy weight rider like me was actually losing ground on the descents! I pressed on regardless.

Next came another turn and the technical, hilly section. This is where I had come a cropper the last time. I had an idea in my mind of when I would know I was going hard enough. It sounds daft now in retrospect but I thought I would know when I had reached maximal effort when I got that rasping, metallic taste in the back of my throat. That is a sensation I know well from years of interval (running) training with hockey and always a sure fire sign you are reaching your limit. I was well and truly getting this taste for it all by now...

I managed to maintain my form through the hills and wasn't scrambling for gears too badly. I rode the whole course in the large chain ring. Then, as I rounded the bend, I could see my minute man again, who was turning for home. I vowed to chase on. A clear road at the final turn and I was onto the finishing straights. It is funny how these short roads that I had studied on the map so many times now seemed so long. They only looked like inches on the map? I didn't know how far to the finish but I kept grinding away. I looked down and realised I was in my top gear - not something I use very often! I felt sure at this point I was going to make the catch. Visions of Armstrong and Ullrich a la Tour de France flashed through my mind. I pressed on but then, there it was, I could see the finish. It was getting closer. I was still a few yards behind. Press on. More power captain. But alas, the race was over...

I didn't catch my minute man but I rode pretty respectably (for me that is. I was nowhere near the top riders but I felt pretty good and rode pretty consistently all the way round). I had no idea of my time. I had set my computer to show me distance rather than time, so that I would know how far to go. It felt as though one of my lungs had decided to take up residence in my throat. It took a while for my breathing to calm down. I was happy. Knackered but happy. Content with my performance.

I think in the end I finished about half way down the 30 man field. I rode the 5 miles plus in 15.08 minutes, so about 20mph average speed. The winning time was an extraordinary 11 minutes something. Again a reminder that I am many things but no bike racer...

The finished riders all had a cuppa and something to eat and then it was time to ride home for me. One of the most pleasing parts of the evening for me was the rides to and from the club. All in all I covered about 26 miles and I felt pretty damn comfortable through it all. I am feeling really happy on the bike just now. My position is comfortable and familiar and my "souplesse" is improving. I made it home just in time to see Sir Alan firing the American bird and have a chat with a fellow Etape Caledonian rider who I met in the street whilst putting out the wheelie bin! (Good luck Rod).

All in all a great night. Back in the saddle again. Roll on next Wednesday...

Cheers,

Col.

Glasgow Nightingale Cycling Club

2009-04-22T01:52:00.000-07:00

Although I have ridden bikes for most of my life (except for a short period during my University years when I was too busy, er...studying ;-O ) I have never been a bike 'racer'. Being a road racer is something that separates you from the average man in the street and allows you membership of an elite clan. It is definitely something that I aspire to.

With this in mind, a few years ago I decided to join a cycling club. I had no idea where to start but was lucky enough to have a good friend who was a member of a local club (Clive, where for art thou now...?) He recommended that we try a club on the North side of the city - The Glasgow Nightingale Cycling Club. It was not particularly handy for me but seemed to offer all I was looking for. I have to say I have never had cause to regret that decision.

The many benefits of the club included that they ran group training rides every week in the summer, longer Sunday runs during the winter and they also put on their own time trials, to give their members the chance to ride this style of event. Since I joined this has blossomed even further to include team time trials and track events too.

The club has a very comprehensive website which can be seen here:

http://www.glasgownightingalecc.org.uk/

and a very active forum here:

http://www.glasgownightingalecc.org.uk/forum/YaBB.pl

Allied to these benefits, club members are given the chance to ride races. This is a driving force for many riders joining a club for the first time. At the Nightingale, other, more experienced members will provide practical advice and support for 'newbies'. They can help with planning, fitness and equipment advice and just general organisation leading up to that first racing experience. They have some stunning new kit too (which I have mentioned before is very important to us cyclists!). Check out the kit page here

I have been a member now for four years or so. Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on your point of view) this has coincided with me having young children. This has limited my ability to ride much at all but I have still enjoyed the membership, regularly reading the forum and trying to keep in touch. Bearing in mind the almost negligible membership fee (less than twenty quid), I cannot see a reason not to be a member. I have ridden APR training rides and tried my hand at time trials. You can see one of my efforts here

All in all, Glasgow Nightingale is a very pleasant club to be a member of. No matter what type of cycling you are involved in, they can help you enjoy the experience. They are a very friendly club and a club going from strength to strength. They have secured good sponsorship deals with NVT, SAPPHIRE and SOLIDROCK CYCLES. I would not hesitate in recommending them to anyone looking for a club in Glasgow. I hope one day to race in the Belgianesqe colours of the Glasgow Nightingale (maybe even later this year...?) but even if I don't, I will have very much enjoyed my times with the guys (and gals) of the club.

Happy riding,

Col.

GTF Blog

2009-04-16T06:13:00.000-07:00

It appears that I am not the only one who has been busy recently. Things at the Geoff Thomas Foundation are equally frantic. They are in the middle of several projects, including Geoff's appearance on the BBC and the launch of their "Virtual Tour de France" fundraising project. Details of which can be seen here:
http://www.geoffthomasfoundation.org/gtf/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=102&Itemid=28

Geoff has also joined the blogging clan, his latest offerings are here:
http://www.geoffthomasfoundation.org/gtf/index.php?option=com_content&task=blogcategory&id=5&Itemid=42

All the best to Geoff and his team.

Cheers,

Col.

Great French Words of Cycling

2009-04-16T03:04:00.001-07:00

Cycle sport is an inherent part of the culture in countries such as France and Belgium, much like football is part of our culture in the UK. Road cycling in particular is steeped in European traditions handed down through many generations. It is also true that French is the unofficial language of road cycling and because of this there is some great cycling-specific terminology. Here are some of my favourites...

Peleton - the term used for the main bunch of riders. It comes from the French for 'herd'.

Contre le Montre - the time trial or 'race of truth' where the rider competes solo, against the clock.

Parcours - a french term for the route the race takes each day.

Hors Categorie - or 'beyond classification' a term used to describe the hardest of the mountain passes.

Grimpeur - a climber suited to the high mountains.

Rouleur - a rider suited to the flat lands, usually larger riders.

Casquette - the short peaked, cotton cycling cap worn by riders.

Maillot - jersey, most famously the Maillot Jaune or Yellow jersey worn by the leader of the Tour de France.

and my own personal favourite...

Souplesse - a word without a direct translation into English. It is used to describe the suppleness or fluidity of a riders pedal stroke. It is often talked about with regard to 'fixed wheel' riding. The great champions are often remarked upon as having wonderful 'souplesse'.

Fine souplesse is something most of us mere mortals can only aspire to. I can categorically confirm (particularly after nearly meeting my maker coming down a steep hill in Kings Park last night on my fixed wheel bike) that my souplesse is almost entirely up my arse...

Keep spinning ;-)

Col.

Beautiful Day

2009-04-13T13:20:00.000-07:00

You will all have had that feeling when everything just seems to go right. No matter whether it is work, sport or in your social life, there are some days where everything just seems to click. I was lucky enough to have one of those days today.

I have set aside Mondays as the days for my longer rides in the last few weeks leading up to the Etape. I was therefore absolutely delighted to see the sun shining when I got up this morning. It meant short sleeves and the summer bike for the first time this year (a lot of cyclists will have two bikes, a winter and a summer. The winter bike is the workhorse, often an older bike, fitted with weather beating accessories like mudguards and maybe load carrying rack and panniers). Using the summer bike means freedom from this extra weight and the feeling of flying...

I deliberately chose a flat route but felt really good as I sped off to Kilmarnock down the old A77. The weather was perfect. Not too hot and not too cold (although I did meet an Aussie cyclist over in Glasgow for a year - still wearing full length tights, jacket and skull cap!). The scenery was delightful (Ayrshire is really beautiful from a bike).

All in all I managed 40 miles in 2 hours 15 minutes. Back in time to play with the kids in the sunshine. So good pacing but still only half distance. Not to worry, shan't spoil my good day thinking about that...

All the best,

Col.

Optician Awards 2009

2009-04-11T04:55:00.000-07:00

Some of you may know what I do for a living. I am an Optometrist (or Optician to the majority of the general public). I work in general practice in Glasgow. I would imagine that less of you know that I have a particular interest in Sports Vision. This is a specialist area, which deals with vision assessment of people participating in sport.

I run a specialist clinic where interested parties can have their vision assessed in the most comprehensive way. As well as the normal tests you would expect to be carried out when you have your eyes tested, we also assess visual functions particularly important for sport. Measurements include dynamic vision (vision of a moving target), reaction speed, hand eye coordination and peripheral awareness. To do this we use the latest in up to the minute Sports Vision technology. We also offer training packages, where athletes can come repeatedly to the clinic and train their eye muscles and coordination. Done repetitively this can lead to performance improvement, as with other areas of sports training.

Our particular set up is pretty unique in the UK. There are other clinics in England, based at the Olympic training centre at Bisham Abbey and Old Trafford, the home of Manchester United. However, we are unusual in that we combine our Optical services and our sports coaching all under one roof. The line between what is Optometry and what is sports coaching is definitely becoming more blurred.

We have had a very busy and productive year in 2008 and were fortunate enough to be nominated for the recent Optician Awards. These are an annual event held by our industry publication "Optician Magazine". They are designed to show recognition for outstanding achievement within our profession. This year the awards were held at the National Motorcycle Museum in Birmingham and we were shortlisted in the "Sports Vision Practice of the Year" category.

So it was that our practice manager and I flew down to Birmingham last Saturday morning. We spent some time at the Optrafair trade show, then got ourselves ready for the gala dinner in the evening. It began with a champagne reception, with a guest list reading like a who's who of UK Optometry. There were lots of faces that I only recognised from magazines. There were also some friendly faces that I hadn't seen for some time. We also bumped into Marilyn Munroe and were photographed by the paparazzi on the way in...

The formal part of the evening consisted of a dinner, attended by 650 guests. There was also a live video link to another 200 or so upstairs in the bar area. We had a very pleasant meal in the company of our hosts, Rupp & Hubrach, who were sponsoring our category. Then it was time for the awards, which were done is a very "Oscars" style. Each section had a shortlist of five, from which the winner would be announced. No one knew the results prior to the event except the judges.

Our award came about half way through the thirteen on offer and I admit to more than a few butterflies. Fortunately, and to my very great joy, we were announced the winners! We had to go on to the stage and accept the award (thankfully no speeches) and have our picture taken.

The rest of the evening passed in a bit of a blur to be honest. I hardly noticed who won the awards that came after ours. I was too busy grinning. As a practice, we are all very proud of this award and feel it is great recognition of what we are trying to achieve.

Take care and keep your eye on the ball,

Col.

Impact Fitness

2009-04-11T03:07:00.001-07:00

At one stage last year, when my son was still pretty young and sleep was scarce, my fitness reached an all time low. I was eating poorly, with lots of sugar and caffeine to get me through the day. There never seemed to be a spare minute, so exercise was confined very much to the back burner. Add to this the fact that I was knackered all the time and you can see that it wasn't a great recipe for a healthy lifestyle!

My wife and I discussed the situation several times and eventually we decided that we needed a kick start in improving our weekly routines. We decided to try a personal trainer, something my wife had done with great success a couple of years earlier after the birth of our daughter. This was how we came to meet Gordon Hill of Impact Fitness, with my first batch of sessions being a birthday gift from my beloved!

I was a bit wary of using a trainer, as it was going to be a new experience for me. I need not have worried. Gordon is a very friendly guy with the ideal persona for a personal trainer. He is very friendly but with a steely edge that helps him to push you on. He tailors each persons sessions to their individual fitness levels. He is also a very fit guy, so you never feel that he is making you do something that he wouldn't do himself!

Initially my sessions took place at my local hockey club. Gordon would set up circuit training for me on the grass. Latterly, when the weather took a dip, we would meet at the gym of Parklands Country Club, which is the base for his training. I enjoyed the sessions from the start , although my fitness was woeful! With the rest of my lifestyle at that time, Gordon was definitely fighting a losing battle! But we persevered.

For one reason or another, I had taken a break from the sessions since Christmas. We reconvened last night. I had asked Gordon to help me with the final push to fitness before the Etape ride. This was a challenge he seemed to relish...

Last nights session was based on interval training. Short sections of near maximal effort, followed by short recovery to allow the heart rate to re-stabilise, repeated. Gordon had me working through intervals on the exercise bike, rowing machine and treadmill. By the end I was gasping for breath and feeling more than a little nauseous! As I begged for mercy, we finished off with some abdominal work and some much needed stretching. This stretching seems to have helped my knee pain quite a bit. I will need to do more of this easily forgotten part of my training regimen.

I will be seeing Gordon once a week up until the ride. If you want details of his services, you can visit his website at:

http://www.impact-fitness.co.uk/
or at here:
http://www.parklandscountryclub.co.uk/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=36&Itemid=57

Keep happy and keep training,

Col.

Coaching Session (Part 2)

2009-04-08T08:13:00.000-07:00

I recently posted about my visit to cycling coach, Colin Bark. He performed a very thorough test of my fitness with an aim to helping my preparation for the Etape ride. Well, I am pleased to report that..."the results are in!"

Colin e-mailed me last week to give me the details from my test. They are as follows:

Lactate Threshold = 148 bpm

Zone 1: Recovery: 97-117bpm

Zone 2: Aerobic: 118-132bpm

Zone 3: Tempo: 133-138bpm

Zone 4: Sub-Theshold: 139-147bpm

Zone 5A: Super-threshold: 148-151bpm

Zone 5B: Aerobic capacity: 152-156bpm

Zone 5C: Anaerobic capacity: 157-162bpm

I don't fully understand these yet but the lactate threshold basically indicates where the body changes from aerobic to anaerobic respiration. This is where lactic acid build up becomes a problem. During the Etape ride, I will aim to keep below this line except for short periods (eg small climbs). The data will also allow me to plan my training more successfully. In particular, it will help me during my turbo sessions to ride at the correct tempo.

The results for my test session are shown in this graph:

Apologies that it is not very clear, but you get the general gist of it. The figures on the right show my maximum power to be 360 watts, my average cadence to be 86.9 (definitely not Lance-esque there, could do with being up a bit) and my maximum heart rate was 165 bpm.

Colin is going to help me plan my training program for the month or so leading up to the Etape Caledonia. Hopefully with his help I can maximise the time I have left and make up for the missed training over the last couple of weeks.

Cheers and keep riding,

Col.

Fitness Update

2009-04-08T05:26:00.000-07:00

As you may have read in my earlier blog post, I have been struggling recently with injury. It started with tendonitis in my right knee. I have since learnt that this is quite common in cyclists and is due to the knee-cap not tracking correctly during the pedal stroke. This can be due to issues with bike fitting (I "fitted" my own bike using various techniques that I have read about. On the whole I am happy with it but there is a nagging doubt that a professional might be able to do it "better". Unfortunately, time, geography and budget will probably prevent this from happening before the ride). The good news is that the knee is feeling a lot better. I have been doing the R-I-C-E as often as I can and have stayed off the bike a bit. I would say the knee is now back to around 85% of it's maximum, compared with the 30% of a couple of weeks ago.

Unfortunately, the knee has not been my only injury problem of late. I have also been struggling with a groin strain. All joking aside, this has been really pretty painful. Bizarrely, about the only time it didn't really bother me was when I was on the bike. This is because the range of motion is so isolated and in just a straight up and down plane. However, almost any other type of movement (including getting up from sitting, getting in and out of the car, turning or lifting) caused significant discomfort. This was driving me crazy and was making me very grumpy (even more than usual!).

I decided that I needed to do something about it. After already having time off the bike due to the knee problem, I could feel the hard earned fitness leaking away. I was loathed to let it all disappear! I ended up telephoning the Sports Injury Clinic at Hampden Park, Glasgow. For those who don't know this is Scotland's national football stadium. The clinic is available to all, professionals and amateurs alike. I telephoned in the morning and an appointment was arranged for later the same day. The clinic is very swish and modern. It is located right in the bowels of Hampden, below the football museum.

I was seen by a very nice physio called Jim, who listened carefully to my history and went through a diagnostic process. This included examining my posture and getting me to perform some stretch and strength tests. He ruled out that I had a hernia and located the problem as one of the small muscles/ tendons/ ligaments (sorry, I forget which) attached to the main groin muscle. He gave me some deep massage and then stretched out the groin muscle. As he was doing this it gave a click and felt immediately much better! I am pleased to report that it has been infinitely better ever since.

I am hoping that this means my bad luck with injuries is all behind me but we will have to wait and see. If nothing else, it has served as an interesting exercise with regard to monitoring my stress levels. During my enforced inactivity I became acutely aware of the targets I had set myself. I was also aware of the (self imposed) burden of pressure I was under. The sponsorship I have raised so far is awesome and thanks to all who have contributed, but it has obviously (however sub-consciously) come with some weight of expectation. I will need to try and manage this as the ride approaches...

Take care and keep stretching yourself,

Col.

Graeme Obree

2009-04-01T14:21:00.000-07:00

There are very few people in the world that I would call a genius. There are also very few people that I would call a legend. That means that there cannot be many people who I would refer to as a legendary genius!

However, last Wednesday night, I had the very great pleasure of meeting someone who I would refer to as just that – Graeme Obree. This is a man who is without doubt, both in the world of cycling and in the wider world, unique. For those that do not know his story, Graeme Obree is a champion endurance athlete and also a top-class bicycle designer. His story has recently been immortalised in the book and movie “The Flying Scotsman”. I will do my best to try and distill this story into a few lines.

Graeme Obree grew up in Ayrshire, Scotland. He took to cycling at an early age, mainly as a form of escapism. He did not have a happy childhood (he was bullied at school due to his father being the local policeman). He quickly became a local cycling champion, showing a talent for time-trialling. He designed a unique bicycle, which enabled him to achieve improved aerodynamics. On this bike (which he christened “Old Faithful”) he broke the world Hour Record (one of the most coveted and hard earned world records in cycling. So simple, yet so difficult. It requires the rider to ride around a track for an hour and travel as far as they can) and the World Championship.

This revolutionary riding style was widely copied but eventually banned (it would appear just because the governing body at the time didn’t like its aesthetics!) Graeme also lost his world record to Chris Boardman. Not to be deterred, Graeme designed a new bike, and a new riding position (christened the “Superman Position”). On this bike, he rode to a second World Title and a new Hour Record.

Throughout all of these achievements, Graeme battled with severe depression. In particular, this affected him at the time of his brother’s death. He twice attempted suicide. Fortunately, he has managed to overcome and manage this condition with the same strength he showed as a cycling champion.

The evening I attended was at the Tramway theatre. It was a lecture to promote the Riverside Museum Project. This is a new museum, which will be on the North side of the Clyde and will replace the current Transport Museum. They are organising events to cover all areas of transport and I was fortunate enough to get a ticket for the cycling event.

http://www.glasgowmuseums.com/venue/showProject.cfm?venueid=7&itemid=33

I decided to ride along to the Tramway Theatre. It is quite close to my house and it was a nice night. In homage to the great man, I rode my favourite fixed-wheel bike (to be honest, I had a notion for getting Graeme to autograph it but in the end I chickened out!). I arrived to find the hall mostly full, with about fifty or so expectant cycling anoraks…

Mr Obree was introduced following a short presentation on the riverside project. He looked a little nervous and a bit unaccustomed to talking in front of so many people. He went to some length to stress that he wanted his talk to be informal and that he encouraged everyone to ask questions as he went along. He was not to be disappointed…

The first section of the talk covered Graeme’s initial years in cycling and how he came to design his bike “Old Faithful”. He talked of looking at a bicycle “as if for the first time” or “through the eyes of a child”. By doing this he realised that there were certain things that were hindering him when he tried to ride fast. The three most striking changes he made were these:

He positioned his handlebars so that he could hold his arms under his chest, rather than stretched out in front of him. This was initially done by turning his conventional handlebars, later using specifically made bars. It allowed a significant reduction in aerodynamic drag, thus making him faster.
Secondly, he realised that the top tube of a standard bike was kind of in the way! He reasoned that this was hindering him during his pedal stroke. He designed his new bike with a single sloping tube to rectify this.
Lastly, and linked to the second change, he drastically narrowed the width of the bikes bottom bracket. This (along with the sloping tube formation) allowed him to pedal with his legs much closer together. NB this is the part of the process that used parts from a washing machine.

Listening to Graeme talk about these changes, it was immediately apparent to me that he is a truly gifted man. He has an ability to look at the sport of cycling in his own unique way and work out the best way of achieving his goals. Interestingly, I asked him whether he thought that he would have been as successful had he not used the various new positions and instead used regular equipment. He answered that he didn’t know? (We never will) Maybe, but he did say that he had ridden very fast times on standard bikes.

Graeme used his unique set up in his first Hour record ride. Details can be seen at this excellent website:

http://www.wolfgang-menn.de/hourrec.htm

Interestingly (as depicted in the film version of “The Flying Scotsman” he had two attempts at the record, on consecutive days! He initially failed in his attempt, whilst using a Mike Burrows built bike. He then returned the next day to break the record (to perform such a feat without adequate recovery time is unheard of, in any sport) on his own bike.

After talking about the breaking of the Hour record for the first time, Graeme discussed the banning of the riding position and the developments that lead to his second revolutionary bike. He talked about the processes that lead to the development of the “Superman Position”. It is totally awesome to think that the man who created such a unique riding style as Obree did with “Old Faithful” then went off and did it again! This position was again heavily replicated and was responsible for the furthest ever hour record, set by Chris Boardman in 1996.

http://www.wolfgang-menn.de/hourrec.htm

Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on your viewpoint (personally, I am a bit torn on the subject) the Superman position was banned too. As far as the Hour record is concerned, the goalposts were well and truly shifted. Now, all records must be set on a “standard” bike, with no modifications. This has lead to the creation of “The Athlete’s Hour” or “The UCI Hour”. The details of this can be seen here:

http://www.wolfgang-menn.de/hourrec.htm

This leads me on to probably the most interesting part of the evening. All through his talk, Graeme gave the distinct impression that he was still very much a racing cyclist. He looked very lean and fit. He talked about recent races he had ridden in. When asked whether he would use the new Glasgow track (once it is built for the Commonwealth games in 2014) he was quite forthright in saying that he would like to break a World Record there! Now you can’t say fairer than that.

He then brought out his “baby” as he called it. A monster of a bike, that Obree built himself, purely to fit within the current UCI guidelines for the Hour record. I cannot believe for a minute that he would go to all of that trouble and not then use the bike…

I was lucky enough to get a picture with the bike, including it’s massive front chainring (I think he said he was running something like 67 x 13, makes my 39 x 14 look a bit poxy!) I only hope I get to see him ride it one day. Maybe on that Glasgow velodrome…

Lastly, Graeme was kind enough to sign a World Champions cap for me. I will be auctioning this at some point in aid of the GTF. Please watch this space for details.

Commeth the Hour…

Col.

Injury and Illness

2009-03-18T14:19:00.000-07:00

Since I began the journey towards the Etape Caledonia, way back in January, I have been expecting that at some point I would be affected by illness or injury. Top of my list of expected ailments has always been illness, as I have two young kids who go to nursery twice a week. Anyone with small kids will tell you that they are total germ factories, and they would be right!

However, it appears that the first thing to keep me off the bike for any length of time is going to be injury. I had a big mile weekend (for me) of just over 50 miles. This is my longest ride yet and over half distance. Unfortunately, it seems to have brought on a bought of tendonitis in my right knee, so I am forced to rest. I am following the old R-I-C-E routine (rest, ice, compression, elevation) and hopefully I will be back on the bike next week. It is annoying because I was getting into a groove. It seems a bit odd to be back on the sofa of an evening after all the time in the cupboard on the sofa...

Cheers,

Col.

Coaching Session

2009-03-14T06:10:00.000-07:00

I recently posted on my cycling club forum looking for advice on what type of training I should be doing. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I have mainly been concentrating on training regularly and eating less. The training I have been doing (except for spin classes) has largely focused on steady pace exercise at a relatively low heart rate. This is ideal for weight loss and building a fitness base. However, if I now want to take it a step further and improve my riding, I need to do more higher intensity training, potentially using interval training. This will allow me to handle short climbs or increases in speed whilst riding.

http://www.glasgownightingalecc.org.uk/forum/YaBB.pl

I was pleasantly surprised when one of our club members, Colin Bark, got in touch with me via the forum to say that he is training to be a cycle coach and that he would be happy to help me out. This was real music to my ears as I am always glad to get some direction in my training. Having someone knowledgeable advising me will be an invaluable training tool.

We arranged for me to go and see Colin at his home, where I would undergo a fitness assessment. I wasn't really sure what to expect but he assured me it wouldn't be too horrible and that it would help him devise a training plan for me. He asked me to bring my bike, kit, a drink and my training diary (since I began this project, I have been keeping a very brief diary. Each day I take a note of my training, my diet, my health/ well being and any remarkable events that have happened. I jot this down in a paper diary - very unscientific)

*One other thing that Colin had asked me to do was to take my resting pulse rate. This is the number of heart beats per minute when you are at your most relaxed. This gives an indication of your fitness level and also can highlight imminent ill health if monitored regularly. The measurement is usually done on waking prior to any exertion (ideally even before you sit or stand). The most accurate way to measure your heart rate is using a pulse monitor, similar to the one I wear when training. Unfortunately, this is not really practical in our household where waking up is usually the result of a screaming one year old demanding attention! I settled for finding my pulse on my wrist and counting the beats per minute (bpm) using my clock radio! Not very scientific I know, but useful all the same. I have taken the measurement a few times and my resting HR is 43bpm. Not Miguel Indurain class (former 5 time Tour de France winner and famed for a resting HR of 30 or less!) or Lance Armstrong (allegedly mid-30's and with a larger heart capacity than us mortals) but not bad, especially for the West of Scotland!

I have had various fitness tests during my hockey career (bleep test, body fat, strength, flexibility etc) but I was interested to see what a cycling specific test would show. When I arrived at Colin's flat he welcomed me in and showed me the instrument that would be responsible for my upcoming torture. He has a Tacx I-Magic, which is similar to my own home trainer but with a couple of crucial differences...

A turbo trainer has a small fly-wheel at the back, which comes into contact with the rear wheel of the bike and provides the pedalling resistance. Usually the amount of resistance is governed by the weight of the fly-wheel and the method of action of the trainer (e.g. magnets, fluid, friction etc). However, in the case of the I-Magic, there is a mechanical brake fitted to the fly-wheel. This allows much greater resistance to be generated allowing the user to simulate uphill or sprint riding. This is all controlled by the systems software. Which leads me on to the second crucial difference, the fact that it is linked to computer software. This allows the user to ride "virtual" races and/ or (as in my case) track their performance and power output. The user can view all of this on the computer screen whilst riding.

Colin attached a couple of sensors to my bike and asked me to put on a chest strap that monitors heart rate. My bike was fitted (minus front wheel) into the I-Magic and I climbed on...

We began with a gentle warm up to allow me to get used to the system. I am obviously used to riding my own trainer, so it was a bit odd riding a different one. The changeable resistance came as a bit of a surprise. One minute I was pedalling along quite happily, the next I was grinding up a hill! It was quite entertaining watching myself speeding through the "virtual" streets and having the crowd cheering me on. Unfortunately, this frivolity didn't last long and soon I had to get down to some real work...

The main bulk of the test was to concentrate on finding my power output. This is to try and find what level of power I can put through the pedals and what my perceived effort is whilst doing so. This is done using a ramp test. Simply put, the system gradually increases the amount of friction generated by the fly-wheel. In doing so, the rider has to use increasing force to keep pedalling. This will cause a related increase in heart rate and perceived effort (perceived effort is a figure given by the rider ranging from 1-20, to correspond to their effort. 1 is easy, 20 is agony).

At the beginning, the pedalling is laughably easy. The only difficulty is trying to pedal slowly enough. Gradually this changes are you find that you are pedalling at your preferred cadence (mine is around 90 revs per minute). The I-magic changes the degree of effort every 30 secs to a minute (I cannot remember which now, sorry). As you pedal, you can see on the screen in front of you the power level you are at. At first, I was managing pretty well. I could still breath and talk to Colin. Gradually it began to get harder. Conversation became less. The beads of sweat began to run down my face and drip onto the floor. On the screen, my power went through the 100's into the 200's and up. I was starting to struggle now and had to change to a higher gear to maintain the required power. I had set a figure of 400 in my head before I started (where it came from, who knows? some crappy cycling novel I read in the dim past probably...). I was still thinking that it was achievable. I was working hard but was now in the 300's. 300 watts came and went. 320 and I was still going. Then, all of a sudden, I was done. As if flicking a switch, I went from okay to toast in a matter of seconds. I managed to 340 watts and that was it. I remember from previous tests that this is not uncommon. Great one minute, done the next. I was knackered but had that nagging feeling that maybe I could have done more? I guess you always feel like this once the actual moment of agony is gone.

I understand from coach Colin that one of the key factors in deciding a training plan is knowing where your aerobic and anaerobic thresholds are. This is the point where the effort becomes too much for the body to handle in the usual manner and it changes the way in which energy is produced. This leads to the production of Lactic Acid. Athletes will sometimes refer to this as the "red line" and talk about keeping themselves within their limits whilst training and racing. Hopefully, Colin will be able to analyse the results from my test and let me know where my threshold lies. I am particularly interested to know what heart rate I should try and maintain during the Etape ride. I imagine it would be easy to get carried away in the heat of the moment and go too hard, too soon. This could lead to a disastrous capitulation towards the end of the ride.

After the power test, it took a few minutes of easy paced spinning to recover. One great thing about years of hockey training is that you become use to recovering from exertion. The lovely metallic taste in the back of the throat and the gasping for air, aaah the memories. Anyway, in a few minutes I was able to speak again, although I was now a lot sweatier than when I started.

Next was a sprint test, where I would have to go flat out for 20 seconds. Great. I have always been at my best when not having to sustain performance for more than 30 seconds (no jokes about the bedroom please). As a youngster I was always a sprinter, as opposed to a distance athlete and as a hockey player I would usually back myself in a short sprint for the ball. Colin set it all up and off I went. Eyeballs out. I kept thinking of what Chris Hoy repeats in the book "Heroes, Villains and Velodromes" by Richard Moore (very good read by the way). He constantly refers to "not leaving anything in the tank" and "get it all out onto the track". So I pedalled furiously, head down trying to get the most out of my knackered, old legs. I intended to go all out and only stop to look up once I had heard the beep of the program finishing...but it seemed to go on forever! Finally I looked up at the screen and managed to flop over the line, doing my best to keep the pace up over the last five seconds.

More recovery required and Colin had a look at the numbers. He quickly came to the conclusion that I expected. I am an ideal fit for a cyclist....as long as no one wants me to go further than 200m! Apparently I have a near elite level sprint capacity but unfortunately not the endurance to go with it. I need to try the track...

In summary, I found the session really enjoyable and very motivating. I look forward to working on the results with Colin as I progress nearer the event. It was really pleasing to find that my fitness is not too horrendous, although there is still much to do. It was also really nice to be told that I was actually quite good at something to do with cycling, even if it is of little use in this current quest! A boost to the confidence is always good.

Lastly, may I take the chance to thank Colin and his lovely fiance for taking time out of their evening to help me. It is generosity like this that really makes amateur sports clubs, such as Glasgow Nightingale, enjoyable and worthwhile. Chapeau!

Take care and happy riding,

Col.

Tools of the Trade

2009-03-12T06:55:00.001-07:00

One of the great attractions of being a cyclist is the need for cycling specific "kit". Once you start riding a bike you soon realise that there is an almost endless list of things you can purchase to increase your riding pleasure. You start off thinking you just need a bike. Then you need a pump, then a puncture repair kit, then lights, helmets, tools. Soon you think a pair of padded shorts might aid your comfort. Then you need a matching top, and a jacket, and shoes for the job, that need specific pedals, and so it goes on...

Cycling kit can range from the mechanical (frames, wheels, cogs, sprockets, derailleurs etc.) to the fashionable (a seemingly endless supply of lycra based clothing items) to the downright bizarre (chamois cream anyone?) The true cyclist never bores of searching for new items to improve their cycling pleasure. In fact this is almost a pastime in itself.

Cyclists are particularly precious about their clothing. I once read a piece in Cycling Weekly by "The Doc" (Michael Hutchison, a renown British Time Triallist and author of "The Hour - Sporting Immortality the Hard Way", a great read) about cyclists and their wardrobes. He made the following point . It would not be unusual for a cyclist to turn up at their end of year dinner wearing a twenty year old suit. However, the same cyclist would happily spend hundreds of pounds changing their range of cycling specific socks as the current trend was towards ones half an inch longer!

So it was with great gusto that I began preparing myself for the Etape Caledonia. I figured that one of the first things I would need to get right would be my attire. I felt sure that this was an opportunity for me to expand my cycling wardrobe. I should not have worried. Believe it or not The Geoff Thomas Foundation have their own range of clothing including jersey, bibshorts*, gillet and cap.

I ordered these items through The Geoff Thomas Foundation website (I will actually qualify for a free jersey as the total has passed £500 raised, one of the many benefits of raising money for GTF). They have an online shop. The garments are made by Impsports of Lincoln. They took a week or two to arrive and when they did, I was very pleasantly surprised by their quality. The temptation is to think that because they are not mainstream items, they may be slightly inferior. Nothing could be further from the truth. The sizing is spot on and the material is of a very high standard. The all important chamois insert was very comfy and well shaped. I will definitely be wearing these as much as I can during my training and obviously on the big day.

I am normally pretty conservative with my cycling wardrobe (apart from a penchant for white sunglasses!). I usually choose black, or blue but the GTF stuff is a very bright colour, lime green! If nothing else, this means there should be no excuses for people not spotting me when I am out and about on the bike. Remember, if you see me, give me a honk on your horn and a wave!

Take care,

Col.

*for the un-initiated, bibshorts are a cycling specific garment. They feature a padded insert, which helps to prevent saddle soreness. Originally this was a chamois insert but is now a synthetic pad. The quality and comfort varies hugely and a good pad is one of the main features of a good pair of bibshorts. They also have lycra straps that pass over the shoulders to stop the shorts riding up or falling down whilst on the bike. Gaps in your clothing at the lower back are common when riding due to the prone position, bibshorts prevent this.

Sleep

2009-03-02T12:32:00.001-08:00

I miss sleep. I miss sleep a lot.

Now, I obviously don't mean by that that I am completely sleepless. In fact I currently sleep a lot more than I have done for about the last four years!* What I mean is that I miss a certain type of sleep. Let me try and explain...

I usually have a look at my kids on my way up to bed of an evening (just to check they are ok) and I am often more than a little envious of their incredibly deep, dreamless sleep. This is a type of sleep that you can really only achieve when you are young. I think it comes with having no worries or cares in the world. Now I am definitely not one of lifes worriers and I am fortunate to have a very happy, comfortable life most of the time. I don't lead a stressless existance but I am no finger nail biter either. However, gradually as one grows up and takes on responsibilites (especially having kids) your lifestyle and your thought processes inevitably change. I think this definitely has an effect on your sleep patterns.

I have always needed a lot of sleep. I have always been an early to bed man (story goes that I used to ask my Mum not to tell my mates what time I went to bed). As a youngster, nine hours or so was the norm. Now I would quite happily still sleep eight hours a night (ideally - like my kids - with an early night and early start, the best time of the day). The big difference though is that whereas when I was younger you could have hit me on the head with a brick and I wouldn't have woken up, now I sleep much more fitfully. It is not unusual for me to take a while to nod off, or to wake two to three times during the night. This is not aided by the fact that I suffer from a condition known as restless legs (google it).

Also, one thing I have started to notice recently is that with the increased volume of training I am doing, I am going to have to pay more attention to "recovery". It sounds daft but I can see that there is a need to just sit on my backside sometimes and obviously to try and maximise my shut eye. There have been a few mornings recently when I have woken and realised straight away that I am short of the required amount. If I don't watch out, this could affect my training. With that, I am off for a lie down...

Take care and happy snoozing,

Col.

*I have a 3yr old and a 1yr old, both of whom now sleep through the night (in their own beds) and are generally great sleepers but this has not always been the case and they have both had a love for early mornings since they were born. 5 am has not been an unusual start time in our house for the last few years, now at least we usually make it to 6am!

Lance Armstrong

2009-03-02T05:24:00.000-08:00

There are relatively few people in the world as famous as Lance Armstrong. There are definitely a very small number of sportsmen as famous as he. However, there are an even smaller number of people who divide opinion quite as much as he does. Considering he is not a politician, a fascist dictator, or a multiple murderer, Lance Armstrong truly has the ability to engender very strong emotions in both his fans and detractors alike.

Most people, cycling fans or not (unless you have been living in a self-contained bubble for the last ten years) will know the story of Lance Armstrong. In 1997 he was a professional cyclist and a good one at that. He had already won the much coveted cycling World Championships and a prestigious one-day classic. He had also won stages of the Tour de France. Then, seemingly at the height of his powers, he was struck down by testicular cancer. The cancer was incredibly severe and had spread to many areas of his body. He had secondary cancer of the lungs and brain. He then underwent several surgeries (including brain surgery) and an intensive chemotherapy program. He survived and then went on to win the world's biggest cycle race, The Tour de France, in 1999. He even went on to win an unprecedented seven Tours in a row from 1999 to 2005 (the previous best was five victories). To underline his commitment to cancer, he founded The Lance Armstrong Foundation, which helps in research and treatment of cancer. Among other things he pioneered the yellow LIVESTRONG wristbands that are now seen on arms throughout the world.

So, all good then you might think? Nothing controversial there at all. Well, the story runs a bit deeper than this brief outline might show and this is what makes Lance such a complex character. I will try and outline this in as unprejudiced way as I can...

Several people believe that Lance Armstrong achieved his successes in the Tour de France by using performance enhancing techniques. By this I basically mean various practices of doping (drug cheating). The theories run from misuse of drugs such as Testosterone and Erythropotein (EPO) to autologous and homogeneous blood doping (re-infusing your own or someone/ something elses blood). These are all well known practices in the world of endurance sport and they all have a significantly beneficial effect on performance (for example, if I took a regular course of EPO prior to doing the Etape, I could expect to be at least 30 mins faster over the relatively short course).

Lance would tell you that he has never failed a drugs test (strictly not true, he failed a drug control at the 1999 Tour for testosterone misuse but, seemingly out of nowhere, he conjured a doctors certificate saying he was using a steroid cream for a saddle sore. He had earlier stated that he had no such exemptions) and that he is the most tested athlete in the world (also not true but he does submit to a lot of drug testing all the same).

On the other hand there is some fairly compelling evidence for the prosecution. Several of his former team mates and staff have stated that Lance used drugs. It has even been claimed by some that he was using these items before he was diagnosed with cancer and that this was part on the cause of the disease (google Betsy Andreu). David Walsh (the respected Sunday Times journalist) has almost made it his lifes work to uncover the myths of Armstrong and his books LA Confidentiel and From Lance to Landis do a pretty good job, without uncovering the "smoking gun" as it is called.

For me the most damning statistics are purely sporting. Prior to his cancer treatment, Lance was a very good cyclist (as I have said a former World Champion and stage winner in the Tour de France). However, he was a certain type of cyclist. He was a one day racer. He was relatively big, strong on the flat roads, with a punchy turn of speed for short climbs or sprints. He was definitely not a mountain climber and definitely not a Tour de France contender (he had competed in the race many times, occasionally winning stages, but always finishing many minutes or hours down on the overall winner). To suddenly turn into a Tour winner post-treatment is stretching the imagination to say the least (Lance and his team always put forward a theory that he had lost weight as a result of the cancer and that this change in body shape was the reason for his new skill in longer races. In actual fact, studies done on Armstrong as a youngster and later in his career show no real difference in body weight).

The second "fact" comes from that first Tour de France victory in 1999. In this race Lance didn't just win, he completely annihilated the field. He won by a margin of 7 minutes, 37 seconds. Now it is not unheard of for a rider to win by this amount but what makes it such a damning statistic here is the riders he was competing against. The late nineties are generally regarded as a time that was rife with doping throughout cycling. In particular, the abuse of EPO to boost the amount of red blood cells in the blood, thus allowing the rider to ride faster, for longer. Of the other riders in the top ten of the 1999 Tour de France, up to more than half of them have either been convicted or suspected of doping, depending on what you read or who you believe. Some of them have been banned from the sport. (see here: http://www.cyclingweekly.co.uk/news/Tour_de_France_19992008_article_267949.html for an idea, although they are pretty lenient on the 99 riders, especially those from Spanish teams, I think.)

So, taking all of this into account, there is certainly food for thought as far as Lance and doping is concerned. Some would argue that "so what" and his legacy to cancer sufferers transcends any cheating in sport. Others would say that this irreparably tarnishes his legacy. You make up your own mind, I guess.

I wanted to finish this post with a list of true facts about Lance. However, this is not as easy as it might seem. Try his name for example (pretty easy that one you might think) he was actually born Lance Edward Gunderson and changed his surname to that of his (now estranged) stepfather. If you search on the internet for his height, or weight, or racing program, or sexual orientation even it would appear that you get as many different answers as searches. So what I have decided to finish with is a list of my facts about Lance. Here they are...

Lance Armstrong inspired me during my recovery from cancer (for this I will always be grateful). His book "It's not about the Bike" is a true inspiration for many (btw his second one is naval gazing crap).

Lance Armstrong got me back into bikes and bike riding (again, very grateful. I wouldn't be the cycling geek I am now, were it not for him).

Lance Armstrong amazed me with his early Tour wins. I revelled in his beating of Ullrich (especially "the look" on Alpe D'Huez) and his total domination.

Lance Armstrong lost a lot of his appeal once I started to scratch beneath the surface and became more aware of the world of professional cycling.

Lance Armstrong is a superb manipulator of the media but is also a bully and I suspect, an arse in real life.

So, Lance Armstrong will always have a place for me (as he will for many millions) but it is not quite the place that it could have been...

Take care and happy riding,

Col.

A stones throw away...

2009-02-27T01:22:00.000-08:00

Since I began this training program (around Jan 1st) I have been watching what I eat. I hesitate to use the word diet (as that is something my Mum would do) but I have certainly been eating less than I was before and definitely eating less crap. It is the first time in my life I have actively not eaten whenever I am hungry, so I have spent significant periods wanting to eat!

I have a long held theory that if we returned to the diets of the 1950's (the pre-junk food age) and just concentrated on eating three square meals a day - our health as a nation would be much better. So this is predominantly what I have done. I have still maintained a hearty breakfast (cereal/ toast), I have had a lunch including fresh fruit (unfortunately the chocolate is absent!) and an evening meal. I have given up the snacks mid-morning (this was usually a cereal bar - a wolf in sheeps clothing if ever there was one). I have also tried not to snack in the evening on biscuits or confectionary (a danger time for all parents of small children. You definitely crave a treat once they are packed off to bed!).

I am not perfect though, I still have one or two achilles heels. Mainly mine are eating late at night and eating too much breakfast cereal (I usually have a bowl at night after my evening training sessions). I have tried to steer towards wholegrain cereals and muesli rather than high sugar brands but I am sure any dietician would tell me I would be better off with neither!

The net result of all this? I weighed myself last night and I have lost a stone in weight! This is since Jan 1st, so about seven pounds a month. I am now 14 1/2 stone, so about half way to target. I imagine that the next stone will be much harder to shift but that doesn't stop me feeling pleased with my progress so far.

While I am on, another half way target nearly reached this week. We are just shy of the £1,000 mark in the fundraising! A great effort from all who have contributed. Many thanks to you all.

Take care and happy eating,

Col.

Oh dear...Oh dear, Oh dear...

2009-02-24T04:53:00.000-08:00

After some meticulous planning and some brownie-point storage, I went for my first "longer" training ride on Sunday. In total I covered just over 30 miles in around two hours. These statistics tell only a fraction of the full story...

In the words of Janice from Friends..."Oh My God!" Talk about dawning realisations. I had been plodding along quite happily until now. I had lost a bit of weight, I was training regularly and I was generally feeling well about things. However, what the ride on Sunday brought home to me was, I can do all of the short, half hour to hour sessions I like...but they won't prepare me for the big day. It appears that the only preparation for riding a bike a long way is riding a bike a long way! Doh!

There are some other mitigating factors in my calculations. I had planned to do some climbing during the ride because as well as covering the miles, I also need to teach my body to ride uphill before the big day. No mean feet when you are my size. With that in mind I headed for nearby Paisley and in particular the climb of the Glennifer Braes Country Park (Glasgow and the surrounding area has some good climbs, The Crow Road, The Tack me Doon, etc. some longer than Glennifer but it is the closest real climb to me).

The journey there was an eye-opener in itself. It was really windy and riding into a head wind is never fun. It made me miss my regular riding chums and also wish for the crowds of the Etape (a rider can conserve up to 30% of his energy by sheltering in the slip stream of others, one of the reasons professional riders need good teams).

Once there, another eye-opener. I was in nearly my bottom gear before I even reached the climb itself! There is a horrid short, sharp hill just before. I was not feeling super confident at this point. However, it was a nice day, sun was out and no rain. I managed it to the top! I had one gear to spare even on the steep bits (I was riding a normal road double chainset, higher gears than my usual triple chainset or the compact I will use in the Etape - all bodes well ;-) I timed myself and what do you know, I got to the top in 13 mins 13 secs - an omen?

Once I got to the top, I stopped for a call of nature and then went back down again. Yep, you read that right. I rode back down. 13 minutes up, about 30 seconds down! I had always intended to re-trace my steps as if there is one thing I am worse at than riding uphill, it is riding downhill! I am a total coward and the Etape has a pretty big descent in it, so I need to hone my bike-handling skills. The Braes is a bit odd in that there is no "down the other side" so you have to go back if you want any downhill. I managed down in one piece and then re-climbed the monster, 13 mins 30 secs this time although bizarrly I felt better!?

I continued the ride home, managing 30 odd miles in the end. About one-third the Etape distance. This is what I mean by "dawning realisation". This was under half-distance and although I wasn't dying on my return, I sure felt it (mainly in my neck and lower back). It is like a runner who is training for a marathon realising what is in store when they do their first run of an hour (ie they still have more than double that to go!). Hey, ho better to figure that out now. I will just have to work hard on saving up some more brownie points!

Take care and keep riding,

Col.

Spin City

2009-02-17T05:01:00.000-08:00

One of the cornerstones to my new training regime has been the discovery of spin classes. I have known about spin classes for ages but have never found one at a location and time that suited me - until now. Since the turn of the year I have been spending an hour or so every Tuesday evening getting sweaty in a squash court with about twenty other people. Sound like fun? It is!

For the uninitiated, a spin class involves a group of people riding stationary bikes (similar to normal gym bikes but a bit more bikey - no huge foam saddle or upright handlebars) lead by an instructor at the front of the class - aerobics style. During the course of the class the riders will copy the moves set by the instructor. These vary in such ways as sitting, standing, fast pace, slow pace etc. The main variable for the participant is the resistance calibration of the bike. Each bike has a large, heavy flywheel at the front, which is driven as the pedals turn. There is a friction "brake" attached, which can be turned gradually on or off. This makes it either easy or hard to pedal.

One added plus of the spin bikes I found is that their double sided pedals are compatible with my (shimano) cycling shoe cleats. So I can clip into the pedals and don't have to use the toe clips and straps. This is particularly good news for me as I have a dodgy big toe on my right foot and the straps dig into it.

I have found the classes really useful. Turbo training is ideal for fitness riding and weight loss (what the coaches would call Zone 1, or low heart rate, riding) but to ride at a higher level requires a good deal of self motivation and discipline. Spin class takes care of that no problem. Being in a group fires the competitive spirit and you can make it as easy or as hard as you like as you choose your own resistance.

We usually cover a range of riding during the 45 minute class. We warm up, then there are a range of hill riding (high resistance), sprinting (high cadence) and posture (horrid riding in an upright position between seated and standing, which makes the legs really burn). You can certainly feel it in the legs at the end of a class. My only problem with it is that I seem to sweat enough for two people! Very unattractive but I am taking it as a sign of the good hard work I am putting in!

Happy training,

Col.

Geoff Thomas Foundation

2009-02-13T12:09:00.000-08:00

I am a confirmed sports anorak, always have been. Ever since I can remember I have read the newspaper back to front (well mostly just the back actually). I have loved watching every sports bulletin going and loved reading about all sports (apart from horse racing - that's not sport, it's just odd). I devour all sorts of sports literature - books, newspapers, magazines and latterly the internet.

When I was younger my sport (to follow rather than necessarily to play, although I obviously did) was football. Not a thing happened in the Premiership (or First Division as it was then) without me knowing about it. I am a particular type of fan, armchair if you like. I don't particularly enjoy live football. I have never been a terrace man. This is partly a comment on football crowds in the UK, partly a comment on my love of sport at the highest level rather than local level (sorry, I would always take the Milan derby over Grimsby v Scunthorpe...), and partly because growing up I watched football on the telly - and that spoils you with regard to close ups, replays and camera angles. Live football can come second as far as watching quality is concerned. Talk about opening a can of worms...

Anyway, because of this fan boy worship, I was very aware of who Geoff Thomas was. I knew he played for Palace. I knew he was their captain. I loved him for guiding them to a win over Liverpool in the cup semi-final (a very hot day as I remember, both semis played back to back, watched them at my mate John's as a sixteen year old). He was also then soon the enemy when they played United in the final (my team - who else would a boy from Grimsby grow up supporting? in actual fact it is Bryan Robson's fault - one of my early heroes).

I was also very aware that Geoff had played for England. To be honest, I liked him as a player. I liked him playing for England. I am very clear that England players need to have good quality but I also want them to really want to play for England. Geoff certainly seemed to want to do that. I was not a Graham Taylor fan - he didn't unfortunately have the requisite quality - but I did think Geoff merited his call ups.

That being said, I know about "that chip". I think it was and is blown all out of proportion, so I am not going to talk about it too much. Players have done much, much worse and kept their place without ridicule. Personally, I would have chosen Thomas over some of the others about at the time, Carlton Palmer anyone? I think he was treated very harshly but I also think he can have the last laugh - as they did crap without him.

I do not remember (as always, memory failure) whether I knew he was ill. I am not sure if I just knew about his illness retrospectively once he started riding his bike.

Later in life, I had a personal return to cycling. I have become a cycling anorak now. I devour all sorts of cycling literature - magazine, books, internet, forums etc. It was through these (and watching the tour highlights) that I heard of Geoff's Tour de France ride in 2005. I donated money to his cause via justgiving.com I was amazed by his story and was only too aware of my own cancer link.

To be honest, I kind of forgot about him after that apart from the odd article in Cycling Weekly (I read about his failed plans to do the RAAM - Ride across America - and his second Tour ride in 2007) until I bought and read his incredibly honest book just after Christmas. It coincided with my final hospital visit (I was still reading it when I was sat in the waiting room) and therefore The Geoff Thomas Foundation was very much in my thoughts when I was seeking a charity to support for my ride. I think their work is incredibly worthwhile and I was also impressed that they had a specific plan for where the money they raised would be used. I am also in awe of Geoff as a person and I have great respect for his work and his achievements.

The Geoff Thomas Foundation can be found here:

http://www.geoffthomasfoundation.org/

videos of his 2007 Tour ride are here:

http://www.cyclefilm.com/geoffthomas.html

I hope that my efforts can help Geoff and his team to reach their targets. I also hope you approve of my choice of charity.

Take care and all the best,

Col.

Chocolate

2009-02-11T12:39:00.000-08:00

My name is Colin. I am a chocoholic. There, I said it. I feel a little better now. Stll hungry, but a little better. Let me try and explain.

Ever since I can remember, or at least as long as I can remember being allowed to make choices about food (this usually comes around the same time as your parents allow you to handle money!) I have loved chocolate. It is my favourite foodstuff bar none. I love fish & chips, I love roast dinners, I am a total fiend for breakfast cereal but chocolate has to win - hands down.

For example, look at its versatility.

Q: Could you have fish & chips for breakfast?

A: No.

Q: Chocolate?

A: Of course!

Q: Could you have roast beef for a snack?

A: No.

Q: Chocolate?

A: Of course!

It is the ultimate in convenience/ comfort/ nourishing/ healthy food. It covers all the major food groups. It is equally at home raw or cooked. Ok, I lied about a few of those qualities but it just tastes sooooo good!

Now, when we talk about chocolate we have to be specific about what it is we are talking about. We are talking about Cadburys. We are specifically talking about Cadburys Dairy Milk. This is without doubt the finest chocolate known to man. Not for me any of your posh nonsense. No siree. No Thorntons or Green & Blacks here thankyou. No plain, no fruit and nut, no turkish..yuk..yuk.. It has to be Dairy Milk. Everytime.

You may have already guessed but in the aim of this challenge - to ride the Etape Caledonia - I have given up chocolate. Yep, me, the confirmed chocoholic has not eaten a single piece of the lovely brown stuff since Jan 1st....and it is killing me! It is all part of a wider dietary plan which I will share with you at a later date but I feel cutting out snacking is a big part of getting my diet healthy.

Prior to the New Year I was averaging about two bars a day. Some days I would go without but some days I could be up to four(ish). It really is pretty easy. Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner, Supper. I told you, so versatile! I would love to tell you that I don't miss it but I would be lying. I have a small incling of what it must be like to be a smoker (never had one, never will). I am not standing outside my office wishing I could have one whilst everyone else is inside looking at me but I do find there are certain life situations where I automatically feel a craving. I have obviously developed some reliance on it (bizarre as that may sound to the non-chocos out there) for stress relief and relaxation.

I gave up once before. I managed over a year (about 16 months) before crumbling at a mates stag party (two Twix saw the end of it, I still remember them!). Once again it was in pursuit of sporting excellence (my previous hockey career) and also just to show myself I could. I wonder how long I will manage this time? I hope at least until May so that I won't feel guilt ridden if I don't get around the route.

Lastly, I ask you a favour. Please have a bar of Dairy Milk on me and let me know how fantastic it tastes!

Cheers,

Col.

A bed, a bed, my kingdom for a bed

2009-02-09T11:53:00.000-08:00

Those who know me will vouch for the fact that I am not the most organised (the memory problem again...). I spend most of my life managing to be vaguely organised thanks to the hard work of two women in my life, Marnie - my wife, and Tracey - my practice manager. If it weren't for them, who knows what a mess I would end up in.

So far, I haven't enlisted either of them in the organisation for the ride. That's how I ended up last Saturday reading an article saying that entries for the Etape Caledonia were up around the 3,000 mark and thinking...I should really get around to booking a hotel room...ooops....

For various reasons, including trying to prevent total bedlam on the Sunday morning, the organisers of the event stipulate that riders must sign on in Pitlochry the day before - the Saturday. As you can imagine, this leads to a huge demand for accommodation in what is a reasonably small, rural area.

It didn't take too many phone calls for me to realise the chances of a hotel room/ B&B or guest house bed were slim to none. I kept trying and ended up with the choice of a hotel room about 10 miles from the start or a bed in a backpackers hostel.

I have mentioned before that one of the main attractions of the EC is that it is run on closed roads. This is great for riding but not great for getting to the start by car in the morning (I had dismissed out of hand adding an extra 20 miles onto my route!). So I decided on a bed in the dormitory of the Backpackers Hostel, Pitlochry. They were very pleasant on the phone and promised me plenty of like minded cyclists to share with! I hope it is going to be 13 quid well spent! I also hope it is not too noisy, although I don't expect to sleep much anyway ;-)

Wish me luck,

Col.

View from a training ride

2009-02-08T12:47:00.001-08:00

I managed an hour or so in the great outdoors today. It was fantastic!! Sunshine, clear air and perfect scenery. I took a favourite route of mine out of south Glasgow into East Renfrewshire. It only takes a little imagination and you are on the roads of Northern France or Belgium, riding the famous "classic" races.

Here is a snap shot of what it was like:

Absolute cycling perfection. I timed it really well too as half an hour after I got home, the snow came down again and all this is a few inches under as I write!

Take care,

Col.

Roads? Where we're going we don't need roads...

2009-02-08T12:07:00.001-08:00

There is no doubt that for most cyclists, the best way to train for riding long distances...is riding long distances. Not rocket science I admit but in the modern world of sports science we are fond of complicating that which is not complicated! As Fred Trueman was so fond of saying in his own inimitable style about English cricketers, "the best practice for bowling...is bloody bowling!"

Simple then you might think. If you want to ride the 81 miles of the Etape Caledonia Col, get on your bloody bike and put some miles in. Believe me, I would if I could. However, there are various obstacles in the way of this genius theory.

Firstly, I am not a pro cyclist and the real world tends to take up quite a lot of my time. Spending four or five hours on my bike at a time is just not an option for me most weeks. I will need to factor some long rides into my training schedule at some point but for now, I have to make do without.

Secondly, I live in Scotland. And it is winter. The weather is certainly a factor!

Thirdly, I have vowed to try and train six days of the week. It is not feasible to spend each of these training sessions riding my bike. It is dark most of the time I am not at work for a start.

So what do I do instead? I spend time with the hoover and the dirty laundry obviously. What?? Yep, you heard right. I undulge in one of cyclings secret tortures...the turbo trainer session.

I spend my time in our utility room, along with the aformentioned household items. Here is an image of my home gym(!) It is the coldest place on earth but as you will see, that is not all together a bad thing.

A turbo trainer is a device designed to allow you to ride your bike without going anywhere. Most of you might think that that kind of defeats the purpose but I will try and explain. It allows the rider to have all of the benefits of an exercise bike (like you would find in a gym) but maintaining their own familiar bike and position (us cyclists are very precious about this, I will expand on this more in future posts).

It has major advantages. It is indoors. You can do it at any time of the day or night. You don't need to get wrapped up warm. You can exercise for the whole time you are riding the bike (no coasting or free-wheeling).

It also has disadvantages. It is veeerrrrryyyyy boring. Sitting on a stationary bike in a cupboard is not the most exciting of pastimes (I watch DVDs on my laptop to relieve the boredom). It is a sweaty business (with no wind to cool you down, the temperature soon ramps up). It gives you a sore arse (due to not changing position). There are some other odd effects experienced by male participants but I shall leave these to the imagination...

I usually manage three or four sessions in the cupboard per week. I am currently combining this with gym sessions, spin class, the odd run and actually getting out for a bike ride when I can.

So, next time you go to fetch your hoover, give a thought for those of us locked in the cupboard...

Cheers,

Col.

The Vital Statistics

2009-02-07T08:25:00.000-08:00

If you have ever read anything to do with competitive cycling, you will probably be aware of what it is that makes some people ride a bike better, or faster than others. It is a thing called the "power to weight ratio". This is, not unsurprisingly, a ratio of how much power a rider can generate (how hard they can turn the pedals) and how heavy they are (including their bike). From a practical point of view, there are other factors involved such as aerodynamics but these play a much lesser role. There are also the obvious fluctuations in performance caused by human nature, such as state of mind, mood, and illness. In a nutshell though, how fast you ride is governed by how much power you put through the pedals versus how much you weigh.

Now, here is the real bummer. It takes a lot of effort to make even small improvements in your power output. Mostly, this is goverened by genetics and your general physical condition. So, for someone like me, who is looking to get better on a bike in a relatively short space of time (four months) I need to concentrate on the weight...

Historically, I have never been one to weigh myself. I have not lived anywhere with scales in the bathroom since I left home when I was eighteen. I would only ever know my weight very approximately and would usually judge this by how much overhang there was on my trouser belt! I have occasionally been weighed at various gyms and fitness tests over the years but not for a while. I generally regard weight as a pretty crap method of judging ones fitness but in this case...needs must. In the beginning, I would have guessed that I was somewhere around fifteen stones, although I would hope to be less.

All this guessing went out of the window when I embarked on my training for the Etape Caledonia. A set of scales were purchased and I started to take note of my weight. I also started to take note of my diet, but that is a story for another day...

When I initially started my preparations just after Christmas, here were my measurements:

Height: 6'2" / 188cm

Weight: 15 1/2 stone / 98.4 kg

I was a bit shocked to say the least. That was significantly over what I thought I was, a million miles over what I hoped I was and so far away from my target weight I could hardly see it in the distance!

Anyone who knows me or knows anything about cycling will know that I am exactly the wrong build for a cyclist. If you take most professional cyclists, they look like jockeys with big legs. They are usually less than six foot tall and often weigh less than most women dripping wet. The most well known cyclist in the world, Lance Armstrong, is actually quite tall for a cyclist at 5'10" / 1.79m and incredibly heavy for someone who climbs fast up mountains like he does, weighing in at around 79kg.

Compare this to his former team mate Roberto Heras (a mountain climber and known drugs cheat...lomg story, another day) at 1.72m tall and a stunning 59kg! Either way, I am some way off a Tour de France thoroughbred...

The biggest/ heaviest rider in the current pro peleton (a great French word used to describe a bunch of cyclists) is probably Sweden's Magnus Backstedt. He is a more reasonable size at 6'4" / 1.93 m and 14.8 stone/ 94kg. Unsurprisingly, Magnus is at his best in the flatter races. He is a former winner of the queen of the classics, Paris Roubaix.

Cyclists are generally endurance athletes. Lightweight with big lungs and small bodies. My sporting career has revolved around covering distances of less than 100m, so endurance is definitely not my thing. I sprinted at school and played hockey at a reasonable level but I am definitely no marathon runner. Rugby player maybe but no cyclist. If I was built for anything to do with cycling it would probably have been track riding (a la Chris Hoy). That tends to suit bigger guys, is over short distances and is suited to those with fast twitch muscle fibres. If anything, this would have been me. Now we will never know as I have never ridden track and I am too old to be a pro rider now ;-)

I had some ideas of what I needed to do to lose weight. I stuck to the basics as the beginning - eat less and exercise more. Not rocket science I know but I had a feeling that I had slipped into some pretty bad habits over the last couple of years. Since my son was born, lovely as he is, I haven't had so much time to concentrate on myself. Lets just say things have been on the slide...

I am just over a month into my training program now and I have to say, I am pretty pleased. My love handles certainly seem a little less easy to get hold of. My trousers are a bit on the "loose" side (I even had to tighten my belt to a new loop the other day!) and the scales are telling a better tale. You can judge my progress for yourself below (apologies for the chest hair but if you work with me, you ahve already seen that anyway;-).

My current measurements are:

Height: 6'2" / 188cm
Weight: 15 stone / 95.3 kg

I'll try and keep you updated on my progress as we get nearer the ride. I am hoping this will be an incentive for me not to slip back into bad habits!

Last note, we are over the 500 pound mark with fundraising - thanks to all who have contributed. We have a new target to aim for of 2000 pounds. Please tell your friends and help make a real difference!

Take care,

Col.

The Cancer

2009-02-05T05:48:00.000-08:00

I really thought I should get this one out of the way, so that after that we can concentrate on more fun stuff...

The first thing I would say is that cancer is such a wide and varied condition. What cancer means to one person can be completely different to what it means to another. Take me for example, what I experienced is nothing compared to the like of Geoff Thomas, or Lance Armstrong for that matter. I am definitely at the lower end of the spectrum.

Having said that I still think there is value in telling the tale and I know that I will personally get something out of putting it down in print. So, to the beginning...

The Diagnosis - As with so many cases of cancer, and in particular testicular cancer, the initial signs were obvious to no one but me. I am not sure when I first noticed that there was something wrong (I have already confessed in earlier posts to my awful memory and it is a recurring theme!). What I do remember is that I didn't do specific "self examination". I do not remember standing one day and thinking "I'm going to look at my balls now to check they are alright!" It just kind of happened. Having said that, I would wholeheartedly recommend that all men do carry out self examination. There is a good article on how to do it here:

http://www.icr.ac.uk/everyman/testicular/self-examination.html

I was lucky, others might not be so lucky. So get on and give them a feel! I noticed that my left testicle was smaller than the right - by quite a bit. I also noticed that it had taken on a hard, solid feeling. I didn't think this was normal. My next step seemed the most logical to me. I ignored it! I let it fester at the back of my mind for a couple of weeks and then (after a prompt from my wife, at the time my girlfriend) I made an appointment with my GP.

The Consultation - I knew my GP pretty well. In my line of work (I am an Optometrist) you meet various doctors and I had dealt with my GP at various times other than just in his consulting room. I was comfortable going to see him, even about an issue as delicate as this one. Imagine my horror then when I turned up and my GP was off sick and I would be seeing a man I had never met before! and to make matters worse, he had a junior doctor sitting in with him. The only saving grace was that neither of them were female and neither blonde.

The next bit wouldn't have looked out of place in a "Carry On" film. I went throught a list of ailments covering just about every inch of my body...except my balls. "Well doctor, it's my shoulder, back, hip, cough..." It was literally only as I had my hand on the door to leave that I finally mentioned the changed testicle.

Here, my luck seemed to change. The doctor (Dr Esler, thank you wherever you are) was very sympathetic and he listened to my symptoms and examined the offending item. As I said, my luck was in and it turned out the "junior" had just finished a six month training post at a gentleman's well being clinic, so as far as ball feeling was concerned, he was Olympic standard! There was a bit of umming and aahing between them and they decided a referral was a good idea, just to be on the safe side. I left pretty happy and re-assurred. I was sure it was nothing...

The Hopital (Part 1) - Practically the next day, there was a letter. A letter with my name on it. A letter with my name on it from the hospital. The next day! The NHS is so slow you would ordinarily wait six months for an appointment even if you were dying, and here was my appointment letter already. Wow. That raised the stakes a little.

Inside the letter asked me to please go and see a Mr Con at the Victoria Infirmary later that week (as it transpired Mr Con was on holiday and I saw a different, nameless consultant). By the time of the appointment I was seriously apprehensive and along with it a little delicate. You know the idea, short temper, not able to deal with very much, a bit pre-occupied. My good lady looked after me very well though and guided me through it all. I shall be eternally grateful for her support.

What followed was a similar consultation and examination to the one I had had with the GP. Mr Con's substitute then decided I should have an ultrasound - my first ever. Little did I know it would become the first of many over the next few years. I never really have got used to the feeling of cold jelly being squirted on my balls - not in a hospital setting anyway ;-)

Now this next bit I remember very well. I was incredibly scared and really did not know what was going on. Here I was fit and healthy (in actual fact as fit and healthy as I have ever been as I was playing National League hockey at the time) but someone could be about to tell me that I was in fact really ill. I just hoped it would go well. I hoped it would be quick. I hoped I didn't have cancer. I hoped...

We (Marnie and I) waited for what seemed like an eternity (in actual fact probably a few minutes?) I was asked to strip and put on a surgical gown. I was then taken through to the ultrasound suite and asked to lie on a bed. I was to be seen by a smartly dressed young (30ish?) man, who would carry out my examination. Like I have said, I was petrified and wishing for compassion and good news. I got neither. He (I unfortunately never knew his name, fortunately for him) was an absolute bastard. He was cold, clinical and down right rude. He sniggered at me when I mentioned my thoughts of cancer. I made a comment (at much to ease my own fears as anything else) that my GP had said I was young for testicular cancer. He cut me down and said right to my face that he didn't know about that, he thought I was just the right age for cancer! By now I was in tears (I don't see myself as someone who cries easily). I felt totally helpless. With hindsight I cannot believe I didn't shout and complain but you just can't in that situation, your emotions are all over the place.

I went back to the waiting room and Marnie patched me up. I got dressed and we arranged to see Mr Con again. I don't remember whether it was the same day, just that when I did see him it was confirmed that it was cancer and I would need surgery. Only after surgery and a biopsy would they know the prognosis. A date was agreed. That was it, I had cancer. I didn't know what to think. I was in pieces.

An interesting part of my experience was that almost instantly my left testicle ceased to feel like part of me. It felt "bad". Wherever I went, no matter how I walked or sat or lay, I was aware of it. I didn't like it.

The Surgery - this will be quick, I don't remember a thing - I was asleep. I remember waking up and demanding chocolate - Dairy Milk - and lots of it. I also remember drinking copious amounts of tea during my convalescence and then not being able to pee in the bed pan. Turns out I was trying to pee lying down, which is almost physically impossible! Once I had swung my legs over the bed it came out like a waterfall. The bedpan was nearly over flowing! I was in the ward a few days, then I went home.

The Ping-Pong Ball - one decision I mulled over for a long time, right up to the morning of the surgery (I was actually sat on my bed in the ward prior to the surgery when I finally decided) was the decision of whether to have a prosthesis fitted or not. To put you in the picture, when a guy has a testicle removed he can decide to be left with just the one, or he can have a prosthetic testicle fitted. This is supposed to match the weight and appearance of the original (in fact I was hoping it would be significantly better than the small, shrivelled up conker I was getting rid of). I think it is made of silicone.

I finally decided to have one fitted. Best decision I have made in a long time. It looks (who does look at your balls? you? your wife? Not a great bunch of folk) and feels awesome. Much better than my remaining natural one. Bizarrely, (this is really just for guys that are going through the same thing!) it feels better during sexual endeavours than the real one! There are risks with the implant. I forget what now, perhaps to do with the silicone, but I don't regret the decision.

The Hospital (Part 2) - Once discharged it was all a little odd. No one really knew what to do or what to expect. My folks were trying to be really, really helpful, which was hard work for everyone! I was tired and grumpy. No use to anyone. However, we managed and after a little time at home to convalesce (eventually just me, Marnie and some really great "trip-tastic" painkillers) I was summoned to the Beatson Oncology Centre in Glasgow's West End. This was the first time I had come across the word "Oncology", which I now know to be synonymous with cancer.

Here, I met my consultant Oncologist. A great guy by the name of Dr Dodds. He was a young guy and he was currently treating Celtic footballer Alan Stubbs for testicular cancer. I figured I was in good hands. As we sat in the waiting room a great debate broke out as to who would accompany me into the exam room. I was not able to think straight. Eventually my Dad (who hates hospitals, doctors, blood, and who could throw up at the mere thought of an operation) came with me. Who decided that I will never know. Anyway...

I remember very clearly that first consultation at the Beatson. Dr Dodds had a very laid back manner and a relaxed, slow way of delivering his sentences. I remember him saying "well...it looks from the x-rays that everything is well....it looks like all of the tumour was removed....and that there was no spread....which is good news........."

That was all the inivitation I needed. "Great, thanks" was my reply and I was off my seat and heading for the door. "Wait!!!" came his call and it was then that I had to sit back down and listen to him explain the cancer treatment and what I had in store. I should have run faster for the door...;-)

Dr Dodds explained the biopsy had revealed I had a "seminoma". This is at the good end of the testicular cancer spectrum. The prognosis is good and the chances of metastasis low. I was obviously delighted with this news. He then went on to explain that he was conducting a clinical trial to see whether a single dose of chemotherapy treatment was as effective for this condition as the usual treatment - a month of radiotherapy. He offered me the choice of joining the study or not. Being a medical professional myself, I felt almost duty bound to enter. Dr Dodds literally drew straws for me. I got the radiotherapy. No one will ever know whether this was a good thing or a bad thing. Perhaps both in its own way.

The Treatment - Still, even at this late stage in proceedings, I was really stressed out. Radiotherapy was an unknown. What would it be like? Would it hurt? Would I be ok? and the eternal question, would it come back? Before my treatment could begin I had to be measured for my radiotherapy "shield". When undergoing the treatment your vital organs have to be protected from the radiotherapy to prevent damage. As I understand it (which might be totally wrong) this is done using a made to measure lead shield. It is lined up and measured against small tatoos that are placed on the skin - 3 on the front and 3 on the back - which I still have to this day. They are permanent. Once this was done and the shield was made, I was ready for session 1. This took about a week.

By the time session 1 came about I was at fever pitch. I was well back at work by now and was attending for the radiotherapy in the evenings. I was knackered. That first session did not go well. I was all geared up but when the shield was put in place, it didn't fit. Unfortunately, I was not happy with this and the poor doctor who was dealing with this very cranky Optometrist got an earful. Whoever you are, I am sorry. I realise now that you were just doing your job (and very well) but at the time I was not equipped for dealing with any deviations from the script.

Eventually, later in the week, I had session 1. It was quick, painless and not too bad. Until the journey home that is. We got half way home when the nausea that was to become my daily companion arrived. I asked Marnie to pull the car over quickly...and I vomitted copiously in the gutter.

The next day was better, I managed to get home before I was sick. The sickness was horrid. Repeated vomitting every few minutes for what seemed to last the whole night. I have never had a particularly strong constitution but this was awful. I had drugs to try and stop it but they didn't work. I tried a few over those first few days until finally (hurrah) we got one that worked. I remember you had to hold it under your gum. Tasted horrible but at least no vomit!

This was the pattern for a few weeks. Work during the day. Treatment in the evening. Trying not to be sick at night. Repeat. Then, it was done. I had finished. What a relief. All that was left then was the follow up.

Due to being in the clinical trial this was more stringent that might normally have been the case. I attended pretty frequently at first and had various scans, x-rays, blood test and examinations. No real hardship but it meant the cancer was never far from your mind (even one with a poor memory like me). Eventually the appointments spread out. A few months at a time and then just once per year. Dr Dodds told me five years post op and then he would discharge me.

Eventually, five years came around and I practically bounced into the exam room for my check up but...hold on...you're not Dr Dodds? Where is Dr Dodds? My consultant had changed. Welcome Dr Alhasso (another good guy) and wouldn't you know it, he liked to follow up his patients for ten years...aargh...hence the reason I only got discharged last week. Hey ho. Better safe than sorry.

The GT Thing

2009-02-03T04:49:00.000-08:00

Never having written a blog before, I had no idea what to call it when I did. I decided after a bit of thought on "GT Winner". Why? I hear you cry. Well, here is a bit of an explanation.

There is the obvious link with Geoff Thomas. I wanted to keep in the forefront of my (and everyone elses) mind just why I had taken on this challenge. I have found Geoff a true inspiration and I hope in my own small way to help his organisation to reach its goals. I class him as a winner, any cancer survivor as a winner and also aim to be a winner by completing my ride - hence the winner bit.

However, there is a secondary, slightly more obscure "cycling related" reason for the GT stuff. In professional cycling there are two groups of major titles to be won. The "stage races" competed for over consecutive days and the single day "classics" races. By far the best known are the small group of stage races known as the Grand Tours. These include The Tour de France, The Giro D'Italia (Tour of Italy) and the Vuelta Espana (Tour of Spain). These Grand Tours are the hardest, longest and most prestigious of all cycle races. Only a very select few get to ride these races. An even smaller number can count themselves a contendor. Only the finest reach the level of Grand Tour (GT) Winner!

So now you know ;-)

Cheers,

Col.

The Ride

2009-02-02T13:11:00.000-08:00

I suppose as part of this blog, I should share with you the ordeal that I have let myself in for. In a moment of madness I have decided to ride the Etape Caledonia, an 81 mile cycle ride through rural Perthshire. It is due to take place in mid-May. Hopefully by then the snow will have cleared!

In order to understand what is ahead, I should initially explain for the non-cyclists the concept of the cyclosportive. It not a race but a mass participation ride that covers a set course. Some will cover the distance at incredible speed, others at a more sedentary pace. I will be one of the latter.

The most famous cyclosportive is the Etape du Tour, which is literally a stage of the Tour de France. Each year, on one of the rest days for the pro's, ordinary cyclists like you or me are allowed the opportunity to try and complete a stage of the Tour de France. It usually covers one of the most grueling stages of the race and requires the upmost in fitness and preparation to complete.

Events like this are now incredibly popular. In the UK alone, there will be around one hundred such events this year. What makes the Etape Caledonia special is that, like the Etape du Tour, it is covered on closed roads with no traffic. It is unique amongst UK events in being able to boast this road freedom. The thought of decending at speed on the wrong side of the road is exciting me and scaring me in equal measure at the moment!

The Route -

The event will begin and end in Pitlochry, Highland Perthshire. As you can imagine for rural Scotland, Perthshire is not particularly flat! My only experience of riding there before nearly ended in hypothermia as a "friend" and I made our way to a hotel on the night before a wedding we were due to attend! I am hoping that if nothing else, I will judge my clothing a little better this time!

As I mentioned we will cover 130 km / 81 miles and the total climbing will lead to an ascent of 1,949m. I only hope I have done some useful training by then...

Details, including a course map and profile can be viewed here:

http://www.etapecaledonia.co.uk/

To give you an idea, this is by far the longest distance I will have ever cycled in one go. My current record is about 65 miles. I have done this twice when riding the Bealach na Ba climb in the Scottish highlands. This is Britain's highest mountain road pass. That in itself was quite and achievement but both times it very nearly killed me! True, the Etape doesn't have such a large climb in the route but it does still have a fairly significant lump in the middle! How I will manage the longer distance (in my much inferior physical state) I do not know...? I guess only time will tell.

In the mean time all the best and cross your fingers for me,

Col.

Cancer Survival

2009-02-01T13:12:00.000-08:00

I was initially diagnosed with testicular cancer in 1999 (the year of Lance Armstrong's first Tour de France victory). The chain of events was realatively simple and predictable. Self examination lead to a nervous appointment with the GP, lead to a (scarily soon) hospital visit, lead to surgery and finally to a month of radiotherapy. After that it was recovery and crossing of fingers...

So it was that I recently attended hospital for my routine annual Oncology check up. I have been attending these appointments and their associated ultrasounds, chest x-rays and blood tests for a long time now. Latterly, it has just been once a year. At one time it was every few weeks.

I am fortunate to not be one of lifes worriers, my memory is too poor, but once I knew the appointment was looming all the old fears returned. Every time an appointment came round, no matter how long it had been, there was always a nagging voice at the back of my mind telling me that this would be the time they would find something. This would be the time it would come back.

So, imagine my surprise, joy, fear and elation when I walked into my appiointment and the consultant told me that this was my ten year anniversary (I really didn't know, as I said, crap memory) and that he would be discharging me! There was the formality of another blood test and one last chest x-ray for luck but in essence, that was it, done. I could now finally put this thing to bed. Never say never but the experts were not expecting it to come back. I could now finally call myself a cancer survivor!

This has taken some time to sink in but I have to say I like the feel of it. It has made me incredinbly aware of how lucky I am and of how different things could have been. I am also acutely aware of the fact that not everyone who suffers from cancer gets the outcome that I did.

With that in mind, I have decided to try and raise some money to try and improve the odds for everyone. I am going to participate in the 81 mile Etape Caledonia CycloSportive in May to raise money for the Geoff Thomas Foundation. This is a charity and a man that I feel I can associate with. I will keep you posted on my preparations for the ride and what is involved. I will also let you know some info on Geoff and his charity.

Please sponsor me on the ride. You can donate very easily at

http://www.justgiving.com/colinmoulson

Take care and live happy,

Col.

Colin Moulson.